View Full Version : From crisis to hope....I hope!!
I hate that you’re not feeling great but try and see the positives. I’m sure spending time with your friends was well worth it. I totally understand how difficult social interaction can be but I also understand how special that time can be too.
Strugglingmum
03-05-23, 10:54 AM
Feeling much better today. Thank you everyone.
Today I have plenty of work around the house to do plus A is off so I have company too!
Strugglingmum
04-05-23, 10:25 AM
Had to be at the doctor surgery for 9 this morning to get my bloods done. The nurse gave me my x-ray results which were clear. Looks like my shoulder pain is all muscular. Hopefully I'll get a physio appointment soon.
How is everyone today?
magie06
04-05-23, 12:07 PM
Good news about the x-rays.
Hope that appointment comes through quickly .
I’m ok, but I went to work with my sunglasses, and forgot my normal glasses… doh! (rofl)
Haha Paula. So you were one of the cool kids wearing shades indoors lol
Strugglingmum
06-05-23, 02:40 PM
Well watching the coronation helped me finish my rather large pile of ironing! Have to say I love all the pomp and circumstance and I found the service very moving, especially when Prince William kissed his father.
I’m with you there - bet that was the first time that’s happened during a coronation!
Strugglingmum
11-05-23, 01:52 PM
Heading for my first EMDR session.
Really nervous about it but willing to try.
Jaquaia
11-05-23, 02:11 PM
Sending hugs (panda)
Strugglingmum
11-05-23, 04:13 PM
It went ok. She was lovely and today was about history taking..... I think I have too much, she says she needs a second session to take history!! Oops!!
magie06
11-05-23, 05:27 PM
(panda)
Jaquaia
11-05-23, 05:35 PM
Her wanting to be thorough is good (panda)
It went ok. She was lovely and today was about history taking..... I think I have too much, she says she needs a second session to take history!! Oops!!
Reminds me of when I went to the physio, I had so many issues I had to have two initial assessments. One for the top top and another for the bottom half lol
Well done, love, and make sure you rest
Strugglingmum
14-05-23, 11:12 AM
So the mister and I have been on a diet. I have only managed to lose 1lb in 2 weeks....sigh!!
Today is also the mister's birthday so we are having dinner out with the family. Looking forward to no cooking and no washing up.
Jaquaia
14-05-23, 11:23 AM
A loss is still a loss!
Happy birthday to the mister, and I hope you have a lovely evening out.
Happy birthday mister ;) have a good one!
magie06
14-05-23, 12:53 PM
Happy birthday Mr. SM. Congratulations on 1lb down. That's one block of butter.
Wow Magie, that’s a great way to look at the loss. Never thought of it like that before. Thanks.
Strugglingmum
14-05-23, 07:56 PM
Oh my goodness. Ate far too much but the mister is well and truly celebrated with all the family. I'm now in my onesie, on the couch in a food stupor!!
Jaquaia
14-05-23, 08:04 PM
I hope it involved cake!
Strugglingmum
15-05-23, 12:23 PM
All that celebrating took it out of me. I slept til after 11am.
My aim today is to at least start on my ironing pile. Its huge!!!
Yuck, I hate ironing with a passion!
Strugglingmum
15-05-23, 09:11 PM
Me too. I've cocooned in my blanket the rest of the day.
Today is not a great one.
Jaquaia
15-05-23, 09:48 PM
You ok? (panda)
Strugglingmum
16-05-23, 01:32 PM
Yesterday was a tough day but I was determined to try and start today off better so I went for a swim and it has definitely helped my head. Yesterday my anxiety had me pinned to the house so it's a win today to have been out
Jaquaia
16-05-23, 01:54 PM
Well done!
Go you! Being in the water has been your happy place. Well done for going.
Strugglingmum
17-05-23, 03:26 PM
Went for a swim this morning and then my eye test. As I thought, my sight has deteriorated abit. I have ordered varifocals for the first time.
I have real difficulty picking frames as i need petit fit frames for the width across my eyes. The alternative is youth glasses. I wouldn't say I love the frames I picked, more like, they'll do.
Varifocals are life changing. But you may find them a bit disorientating for a few days. Bear with, though, it’s worth it
Strugglingmum
17-05-23, 07:30 PM
Mu sister has just invited me away for a couple of nights in June to our beautiful north coast. I think I'll go, I definitely need a wee break.
Jaquaia
17-05-23, 07:38 PM
It will do you the world of good!
Fab idea! You deserve a break
Strugglingmum
18-05-23, 10:58 AM
Today I am getting my nails done for the first time ever.
Being a nurse for years I was never able to have nail polish etc.
I've always said, I'm not a nails type of person but recently I thought, how do I know I'm not a nails type of person if I've never tried. So today I try.
Jaquaia
18-05-23, 11:22 AM
Ooh! What are you going for? Sparkles? 3inch talons? (giggle)
magie06
18-05-23, 12:28 PM
Any pictures? Did you go fire engine red? Nude? Pale pink? Any sparkles or diamonds?
Ooooo pic please! I love having my nails done, it’s just a bit of time where I can switch from anything except being pampered :)
Strugglingmum
18-05-23, 03:52 PM
So I have hard gels in a rose pink colour with squared tips and silver glitter at the cuticle fading up the nail. I love them. Well worth growing my nails for.
I've booked my next 2 appointments ;)
Strugglingmum
18-05-23, 10:28 PM
Lots of crochet on the go here this evening. I have so many orders, I need to get a move on.
What’s your plans for tomorrow?
Strugglingmum
19-05-23, 08:13 PM
Today I went for a short swim and did the shopping. By the time I had it all put away I felt drained. Cooked tea and now on the sofa with my crochet hook going.
Strugglingmum
20-05-23, 04:39 PM
I can't understand why I am so tired all the time. Housework today and then a short walk. Now helping my son build his flat pack wardrobes
Sounds like you’ve been busy. Plenty of reason to feel tired.
You’ve been struggling lately, that is always going to make you feel tired. Are you able to fit some self care into your day tomorrow?
Strugglingmum
21-05-23, 12:31 PM
Slept til 10am. Have just been sorting stuff for family dinner later. I have talked with A about my low motivation, energy etc. I'm just not sure if it's my MH or menopause. I'm taking loads of supplements to try and help with menopause but it doesnt seem to be improving any. Maybe it just takes more time.
Is it worth talking to your GP about it?
Strugglingmum
21-05-23, 04:01 PM
I was thinking that, I just dont want to be a bother.
You are never a bother. If this is affecting your life, you should talk to someone about it
Strugglingmum
21-05-23, 04:57 PM
I have an appointment with my consultant tomorrow to see what changes to my meds can be made, 2nd EMDR session on Tuesday. I took a short 30min walk this afternoon to try give me a lift, it helped a bit. They are all here for Sunday dinner so needed that lift to help me through cooking it all.
Only lost 0 5 lb this week . God I hate menopause!!!
Jaquaia
21-05-23, 06:46 PM
A loss is still a loss!
It’s still half a pound in the right direction.
I will say, though, that you’re not exactly huge anyway……
Strugglingmum
22-05-23, 06:32 PM
A swim and a consultant appointment this morning. I came home and just cocooned for a while then picked up the crochet hook. I guess I need to make food for my men folk!!
Strugglingmum
23-05-23, 11:01 AM
Was the appointment ok?
It was ok. He has increased one of my meds and will review me in 3/4 weeks to increase another if nothing is changing. I have an appointment with my EMDR therapist today.
Good luck with the therapist. Don’t forget to take it easy afterwards and be kind to yourself.
Hope today isn’t too difficult. Sending love (panda)
Strugglingmum
25-05-23, 10:55 AM
It's a beautiful day here. I'm sat on the front door step enjoying the sun.
I've got roped into organising a funeral tea for the church tomorrow. I've been told about 50 people so I'm a bit stressed. I know I can do it but my anxiety has been so bad recently it takes very little to send me spiralling.
They were stuck for someone to do it and when asked, me being me, couldnt say no.
Anyway, it will do me good to think of someone else for a change!!
Will you be on your own or will there be others to help you?
Strugglingmum
25-05-23, 03:51 PM
Io is coming to help me in the kitchen and I've a couple of people to help serve tea coffee etc. Its buffet style so once it's out on the table it's just a matter of topping up the plates. I've spent today shopping and prepping sandwich fillers
Strugglingmum
25-05-23, 09:21 PM
Been a busy kind of day and tomorrow is going to be busy too.
Tomorrow I pick up my new glasses. Here comes the varifocals!
Can I suggest you don’t wear them while doing the lunch? For most people, it takes 3 days or so for the brain to adjust, but it’s definitely weird at first. And totally worth it when you do :)
I’ve never had varifocals cos I’m too scared. I prefer distance and near glasses. Either way as Paula has stated, it takes time to get use to the new prescription.
Strugglingmum
26-05-23, 05:08 PM
I can see. I didnt realise how much I was missing
That’s really good to hear!
Strugglingmum
27-05-23, 02:55 PM
Haven't stopped all day. Sitting down to take a break and catch up. We are going to my son's girlfriend's parents tonight for pizza. They have a pizza oven so looking forward to it.
Are you resting tomorrow?
Strugglingmum
28-05-23, 12:26 PM
Huge pile of ironing done but its given me a sense of achievement.
Last night we went to my son's girlfriend's parents for the first time. We had a lovely chilled evening together and I definitely feel we could share grandchildren with them!!
That’s fantastic! Katie has been with Dom for almost 4 years and I still haven’t met his dad!
Jaquaia
28-05-23, 02:58 PM
My parents met my brother's in-laws on their wedding day! It gives me loads of ammunition to wind him up with! (giggle)
Strugglingmum
28-05-23, 06:16 PM
I had met them in passing a few times but it's the first we actually spent time together itms
Strugglingmum
29-05-23, 04:01 PM
After a busy weekend I have spent today catching up on rest and crochet.
Sounds sensible. How did you cope with your busy weekend?
Strugglingmum
29-05-23, 09:27 PM
Um, a bit of anxiety overload but I made it through
Strugglingmum
30-05-23, 10:54 AM
Another beautiful day here. Think I'll move outside withmycrochet this afternoon. Walk first though
Sounds like a perfect day to me!
Strugglingmum
30-05-23, 05:26 PM
I was proactive today and booked a private appointment with a menopause specialist. It's in July so not too far away.
I also sorted out my car insurance. Feeling accomplished
Car insurance is always a pita. Well done for getting it out of the way for another year.
Strugglingmum
31-05-23, 01:06 PM
On checking my bank account this morning I found out BT had taken a large sum if money. 30 mins on the phone to them they agreed they had over charged me and credited my BT account but that doesnt help my bank account!! I now need to move money to stop me going in to my overdraft. Anyway got it sorted but it I'd stress me a bit.
Made myself go to the pool even though I didn't feel like it. Only did 20 lengths but at least I went.
Going to cocoon this afternoon I think
Cocooning sounds like a plan. Be kind to you for the rest of the day (panda)
Strugglingmum
01-06-23, 11:14 PM
I was a bit down today so hubby took me out to the pub for tea. It was a treat not to cook and wash up.
Well done for recognising it though. Hope tomorrows better (bear)
Strugglingmum
03-06-23, 08:24 PM
I have been out the whole day at the first pipe band competition of the season. I am roasted, very little shade to be found but you know what?
My daughter said she was really glad I went with her and it was nice to have me there. Little steps forward!!
How are you doing, lovely?
Strugglingmum
05-06-23, 09:24 AM
I'm ok , I'm off to cook for lunch club this morning.
How did lunch club go? How are things? What’s your mood like atm?
Strugglingmum
06-06-23, 10:24 AM
Lunch club went well although we were missing a couple of our regulars. I cooked lasagne and chips and jam and coconut sponge with custard.
I'm heading away for a night at the north coast with my sister. She is staying all week but I'm just going for tonight as I have EMDR on Thursday. I'll come home tomorrow night.
My mood is just about ok but I'm hoping plenty of walks by the sea will help.
Have a lovely time, hunni
Strugglingmum
08-06-23, 11:42 AM
Spent 2 days away with my sister and came home last night. It was a lovely break and helped lift my moods bit just in time for EMDR this morning
Fab! I’m so glad you had a good time. Mind you, I’m also glad you’re back ;)
How are you doing? How was EMDR?
Strugglingmum
09-06-23, 06:25 PM
At the moment we are working on putting my support techniques in place for starting work on my flashbacks. I start work on those at next appointment in 3 weeks time.
Strugglingmum
11-06-23, 12:27 PM
I've only gone and fractured my ankle!!
Oh no! How did that happen?? (panda)
Strugglingmum
11-06-23, 01:22 PM
I fell going out to the washing line this morning. Such a silly accident.
Jaquaia
11-06-23, 04:47 PM
Hope it heals quickly (panda)
Strugglingmum
12-06-23, 09:50 AM
I'm sore and swollen today. I have feet up, crochet in hand and Goodnight Mr Tom on the telly
Jaquaia
12-06-23, 11:32 AM
It's such an amazing film!
Not seen seen that in a while.
Strugglingmum
13-06-23, 09:50 AM
I'm ok . My ankle has an boot cast on it so I can take it off at night. It has turned a beautiful shade of black purple!! Im sore but coping itms.
Other than that a bit fed up at being grounded!!!
Awww you’ve kindly painted yourself in DWD colours, what loyalty ;)
Big hugs, lovely. Have you got things you can do?
Strugglingmum
13-06-23, 12:57 PM
I have crochet and a couple of books. I also have jigsaws if I take the notion.
Strugglingmum
15-06-23, 11:50 AM
I'm feeling a bit flat today. Being unable to do the things that really help my head is tough.
I'm feeling fat and sluggish and need a kick up the backside to motivate me to do the little that I can do.
I will just state for the record that you are not fat, not even in the slightest. Having said that, we all have those sort of days, love, so big hugs.
I’m not surprised you’re flat, it’s not been easy recently and now being more immobile, when you love your walks, swimming etc, must be so difficult. Are you on your own every day atm? Is there anyone from church you could invite over for a coffee?
Strugglingmum
16-06-23, 10:20 AM
So today my eldest turns 25!!!
We are bbq tonight. He doesnt know we have invited a few of his friends to surprise him.
Bless him, he has to take me shopping this morning for supplies. Hope he doesn't catch on that I'm buying a lot more than should be needed for 4 people (rofl)
(rofl) can you wish him a happy birthday from us?
Strugglingmum
16-06-23, 08:59 PM
So it was a lovely surprise. All the young ones are fed and sitting out in the garden having a few drinks and talking and laughing. Me and the hubby have retreated inside after feeding them. Loads of chicken and sausages left so that's our sandwich fillings for tomorrow sorted!
Io has another pipe band competition tomorrow so we are going with her. Its lovely seeing her outside in the middle of her brother's friends having fun.
I’ve just beamed from ear to ear! What a wonderful post :)
Glad a great day was had by all
Strugglingmum
19-06-23, 10:17 AM
Being physically active is how I've always helped cope with my mental health. Having a broken ankle and not able to move is really hard. I broke down in tears to A last night out of frustration and just feeling so overwhelmed with symptoms and no way to ease them.
Today I'm feeling a bit better and am trying to do little things to help.
I know it’s not the same but are there any seated exercises you can do to keep active? Maybe YouTube has some ideas.
(panda) I’m not surprised, love. When do you go back to get it checked?
Strugglingmum
19-06-23, 10:23 PM
I have an appointment with fracture clinic next week.
I am going to phone my psychiatrist tomorrow to get my olanzipine increased short term to help me through
Jaquaia
19-06-23, 11:00 PM
That sounds like a good plan (panda)
Good to hear, love (bear). Are you being kind to yourself atm?
Do you speak to your psychiatrist? Are you ok? Looking after yourself?
Strugglingmum
21-06-23, 07:05 PM
So I got my olanzipine increased to help me at night.
A took me out for a drive last night to get me out of the house and we popped in to see our friends. It gave me a lift. I am doing ok.... but just ok itms. I'm getting through.
I wont have an EMDR session until late in July due to not being able to drive cause of my ankle.
(panda) I’m so sorry, hunni, this is all complete crap for you.
Strugglingmum
23-06-23, 11:32 AM
I got a pile of ironing done today. It's a bit stormy here today so I'm content to stay inside at the moment. I'm going to get some crochet done but I am feeling a bit aggitated. I'd love a good walk!!
I've also got the next book in the series I'm reading so hopefully that will keep me occupied for a while.
Strugglingmum
25-06-23, 11:54 AM
Its raining here today and we have a bbq to go to!! Typical!!
Hopefully it dries up a bit.
Raining?? Hopefully it stops and you have a good time
Jaquaia
25-06-23, 01:11 PM
We're due thunderstorms this afternoon! It may explain why the cat is being a bit of a dick!
Strugglingmum
25-06-23, 11:20 PM
Had a lovely day at my brother's. Met my new great-niece and had a cuddle. The sun came out long enough for us to eat outside. I have an appointment at the fracture clinic in the morning so early start!!
Crossing everything for the appointment, lovely
Strugglingmum
27-06-23, 02:12 PM
After a busy day yesterday I have taken it really easy today.
Good to hear. How are you feeling?
Strugglingmum
27-06-23, 10:09 PM
I feel better after an easy day
Strugglingmum
28-06-23, 07:23 PM
Another easy day, although I did finish my order and currently have no more on the books so I had a trial on my new knitting machine
Strugglingmum
29-06-23, 10:54 AM
Yip I bought one to try. Let's just say I need more practice!!
Strugglingmum
29-06-23, 08:50 PM
Just realised that this time next week I will be frantically packing for our holidays. Its really crept up on me this year but I'm looking forward to a change of scenery
Strugglingmum
30-06-23, 11:45 AM
We have rented a house on our beautiful north coast. We are all going and the kids have friends coming and staying for part of the week as well..... it will be like a refugee camp for a week!!
Strugglingmum
01-07-23, 09:08 PM
I've had a bit of a naff day with my mood. Very fed up at not being able to go out
Any chance you could borrow a wheelchair from somewhere?
Strugglingmum
02-07-23, 05:34 PM
I can manage on crutches but because we live in the countryside I need someone to take me out in the car. A has been otherwise busy
Strugglingmum
03-07-23, 03:09 PM
Had a review with my psychiatrist today. Slight change in meds and he is keeping me to short time periods between appointments.
Io then took me shopping so I've had a busy morning. Having a sit down with my foot up for a while
I’m glad he’s keeping an eye on you, love, you deserve to be feeling well
Strugglingmum
04-07-23, 06:49 PM
Had a chum call in today for a surprise visit. Definitely cheered me up a bit
Jaquaia
04-07-23, 07:50 PM
Good! You definitely deserve good things
Strugglingmum
05-07-23, 05:42 PM
Hair done and nails done. Feeling perky
Strugglingmum
06-07-23, 09:33 AM
My nails are baby pink, baby blue, pale gray with the pink and blue accent.
I had a busy day yesterday, today will be busy too trying to get ready for our holiday tomorrow
Oooo that sounds gorgeous!
How long are you away?
Strugglingmum
06-07-23, 03:15 PM
We are away Friday to Friday and I cant wait!!
Jaquaia
06-07-23, 05:39 PM
Have fun! You deserve it!
Have a wonderful time, lovely!
Strugglingmum
07-07-23, 09:19 PM
We arrived at our holiday rental and the house is stunning with an amazing view over the Atlantic coastline. Cant wait for sunset to watch it from the upstairs snug.
I even managed a 45mins walk with A and Katie!!
Jaquaia
08-07-23, 09:50 AM
Have a great time!!!
Strugglingmum
09-07-23, 10:53 AM
Have to say I'm having a lovely time away!!
It looks absolutely beautiful where you are! :)
Strugglingmum
10-07-23, 09:56 PM
A quiet day today. Was much needed!!
Jaquaia
11-07-23, 04:22 PM
How's the ankle?
Strugglingmum
14-07-23, 05:39 PM
Back home from holiday. Had a lovely week but it was a bit too full of people by the end. Glad to be home in my own space.
We now have my friends dog staying for 2 weeks while they are away. Should be fun!!
I’m glad you had a good time! Are you going to rest this weekend?
Strugglingmum
17-07-23, 04:05 PM
Good news today from fracture clinic. My break is 90% healed and I can start to increase time out of my boot. I have exercises to do to strengthen the ligaments again.
I'm hoping to be in the pool again by the end of the week
That really is awesome news.
Strugglingmum
18-07-23, 10:46 AM
Emdr today. Tbh I'm not looking forward to it.
Strugglingmum
18-07-23, 01:32 PM
EMDR is hard. I'm thoroughly exhausted. Blanket and sofa the rest of the day. I feel so drained. Lets just hope its worth it!!
Well done, lovely. And I’m so glad you’re grabbing your blanket and chilling. Blanket fort maybe? ;)
Blanket and sofa sounds like a plan. Was there chocolate too?
Strugglingmum
18-07-23, 11:26 PM
It's a long time since I felt such a therapy hangover. I slept this afternoon and really haven't achieved anything with the rest of my day. There's always tomorrow
You’ve been through a lot physically recently which decreases your reserves, so it’s not a huge surprise. Just take whatever time you need (bear)
Paula is absolutely right (as usual), you’ve been dealing with physical and mental issues which takes its toll. Remember resting as part of your recovery process. It’s not a bad thing to sleep as and when you need it. That is when your body and mind heals best.
Strugglingmum
24-07-23, 12:10 PM
Last week was a toughie!!
Today I feel a bit more like me and have been catching up on jobs. My ankle is still achy and swollen but I'm getting around on it fairly well and driving ok.
Today I can catch up on my crochet order.
You got through though! Massive achievement! Rest up, hunni
Strugglingmum
25-07-23, 08:10 PM
So um today I did a thing!!
I went to choose our new dishwasher, got that sorted.
On my way back to the car, I went for a nosey in a sofa shop as we had been talking about new sofas. Was just going to look.
I saw exactly what I wanted and bought them. I've never bought furniture without A!!
15 weeks to new sofas!!
Blimey, that’s brave! Does he know what they look like? (giggle)
Strugglingmum
26-07-23, 08:51 AM
I sent him a photo!
I had an early start today. I'm on the bus to the city for my appointment with my menopause specialist. I hate going to the city!!
Hope the appointment goes well, lovely
Strugglingmum
26-07-23, 11:08 AM
On the bus on my way home. It was great. Starting body identical hrt to reduce risk of side effects or drug interactions
Strugglingmum
28-07-23, 03:49 PM
Honestly a horrible day. I found Io's cat lying on the doorstep this morning. Very long story short, we had to get him put to sleep. We are heartbroken and Io is devastated. I'm shattered, I spent most of the morning at the Vets or running backwards and forwards to the vets. My spoons are definitely spent for the day.
Jaquaia
28-07-23, 03:52 PM
(panda) so sorry. Feet up for the rest of the day?
Oh sweetheart, I’m so sorry. It’s heartbreaking, I know. Please let A take care of you for the rest of the day (panda)
Awww that’s so sad. Losing a pet is like losing a family member.
Strugglingmum
30-07-23, 01:03 PM
What a rollercoaster of a week. There have been highs and deep lows but its Sunday lunchtime, I'm starting meal prep for our family dinner for later when the 5 of us get to sit round the table together. I'm blessed to have them.
Hope you all enjoy it. :)
Strugglingmum
31-07-23, 12:20 PM
I've the shopping done and put away. Not sure what toget up to the rest of the day. The mood is a bit meh today.
Strugglingmum
01-08-23, 10:43 AM
EMDR session today. I'm not enjoying it at all but I just keep thinking, maybe this is the key.
Do you feel it’s making any difference yet? How many sessions do you have/have got left?
Strugglingmum
01-08-23, 01:02 PM
I'm not sure if there is a limit on sessions, that hasn't been stated. Today was only my 2nd actual therapy session. You spend the first couple of sessions doing prep work for the therapy. I'm tired after it.
I've been looking after a friend's dog for a few weeks. Hopefully he is going home today!!
Good, then you can take as long as you need with the therapy :). Are you going to be taking it easy today? (bear)
Only hopefully? Has the dog been hard work?
Strugglingmum
01-08-23, 07:38 PM
Ivebinge watched sweet Magnolias this afternoon.
The dog was a typical labrador, very loving, very happy, always into something. I have spent the last few weeks saying things like, where are you, what have you got in your mouth etc. Katie is so easy compared to him. He is very busy, she is prepared to lie down beside me and just be still.
Oh I know that feeling so well. I have a few friends with dogs that I look after and as lovely as they are, they are all hard work compared to Talia. She is one of a kind.
Strugglingmum
05-08-23, 06:13 PM
Been a busy day. Had an early morning meeting then with Io and A at a band competition. Glad to be home and feet up.
Strugglingmum
07-08-23, 10:00 AM
Off to cook for seniors lunch club today. It will be good to see them again as I missed last month due to my ankle.
Strugglingmum
08-08-23, 02:28 PM
Managed a longer walk after lunch. I'm building up rightly with my ankle. Did the food shop this morning so now I'm going to sit down with my crochet and some sweet Magnolias
You’re awesome - so strong and motivated!
Strugglingmum
08-08-23, 08:01 PM
Oh thanks, I dont feel that way. Went for another walk this evening after tea, not as far but did a couple of miles.
Strugglingmum
12-08-23, 08:40 AM
What's everyone up to today?
I'm spending the day with my daughter at a band competition.
Forecast is rain so a wet day I imagine!
Jaquaia
12-08-23, 10:53 AM
Visiting my mum and sorting her meds out! Then packing as we have a very excited little girl on our hands!
Strugglingmum
12-08-23, 10:55 PM
So I didn't get home after the competition, went to a friend's house for a Chinese. Only just home since 8am. Exhausted!!
Jaquaia
13-08-23, 08:42 AM
Resting today?
Strugglingmum
13-08-23, 12:12 PM
Nope, well I had a lie in.
Ironing done and off to a bbq later
Strugglingmum
14-08-23, 01:38 PM
So was out doing the shopping this morning. I dont mind the shopping so much as putting it all away!!
Anyway, all done and a cup of tea in my hand. So what are you all up to today?
Strugglingmum
15-08-23, 10:38 AM
Good morning everyone!
It's one of those days when its sunny one moment and looking like a downpour the next. I have a therapy appointment this morning.
I had planned to go for a swim after but I didn't sleep well so I'll see how I feel after.
What's everyone up to?
Strugglingmum
15-08-23, 03:29 PM
Therapy and then a swim. I've been lazy all afternoon so gonna head for a walk.
Strugglingmum
16-08-23, 12:01 PM
Slept better last night thankfully. I've walked 4 miles today, that's the furthest I've managed on my ankle. Time to get some stuff done around the house.
What are you all up to today?
Jaquaia
18-08-23, 09:25 PM
How is the ankle holding up?
Strugglingmum
19-08-23, 09:12 AM
I've been out walking well on it thanks Jaq.
Still a bit stiff and sore at times.
Out all morning at a meeting so I'll be on my bum a lot.
Strugglingmum
24-08-23, 04:01 PM
Having a bit of a hard day, but I have been out to do the necessary errands, hoovered the downstairs and went for a walk. I'm not sleeping great at present and I think that's having an effect
Have you been able to go swimming? I know that helps to settle you
Strugglingmum
24-08-23, 05:36 PM
I haven't been swimming this week as just making excuses each day.
I'm really anxious. The factory where my husband and son work are making redundancies. I am so worried I'm going to end up with both of them paid off and dont know how we will manage. I know I'm borrowing trouble but until we know for definite I am panicked. I'm trying to say all the right things and appear calm for them but I'm scared.
Of course you’re worried, anybody would be. When will you find out? (panda)
Love, can you prioritise a swim tomorrow?
Strugglingmum
24-08-23, 08:05 PM
I have things to do tomorrow but I will still prioritise my walk.
I dont know when we will hear. They seem to be assessing each departments staff atm.
Of course you’re going to be worried. It’s only natural but you also know that when you exercise you feel better and taking time out to do something you enjoy that is also beneficial for you is even more important during difficult times.
Strugglingmum
29-08-23, 07:10 PM
Went for my EMDR session today but didnt do any. My therapist wasn't sure I was in the right headspace to do it so we talked some things through instead. It actually helped.
Good to hear it helped. How are you tonight?
Strugglingmum
29-08-23, 09:00 PM
Feeling better than I normally do after therapy.
I think it helped build a bit of trust with her.
It does get easier with time and having trust in your therapist makes it easier still.
Strugglingmum
01-09-23, 11:19 AM
Have tbh and say I've had better weeks. Dont know what's wrong with me, I'm very flat. Motivation is low and I'm easily irritated. Maybe the weekend will pick me up.
(panda) are you having a quiet weekend? Have you got back into swimming?
I dunno about you but having workmen in around the home is really stressful and it takes me a while to get back on track. You’ve admitted getting exercise has been difficult and we all know you do better especially after a good swim. Maybe not being able to prioritise exercise taking its toll? Or maybe the switch during therapy, which it sounds was needed, knocked you slightly of track? I can totally relate to unexpected changes, even when essential or necessary, can throw you off.
Strugglingmum
06-09-23, 10:14 AM
It's our wedding anniversary today, 27yrs!!
Man deserves a medal. We wont get to spend any time together today as I have to go out this evening but maybe we will organise a meal out at the weekend.
I'm going for a swim this morning and doing the shopping.
I'm having to really force myself but I know it will be worth it later.
Congratulations on your 27th wedding anniversary
Strugglingmum
10-09-23, 09:31 AM
The sun has disappeared here this morning. Hopefully it will reappear later. We had a lovely meal out last night for our anniversary. I'm heading to church this morning, first morning service in months. Hope my anxiety levels dont peak!!
Strugglingmum
11-09-23, 08:58 AM
I was still wide awake at 4am. Shattered today.
I have phoned to speak to GP so just waiting on him phoning me back. My shoulder is really bothering me again, I think the cortisone injection has worn off. That's not why I couldn't sleep , I just couldn't sleep but I need to get it sorted.
Im glad you’ve called the doctor about your shoulder. When are you next speaking to your psychiatrist.
Strugglingmum
11-09-23, 10:39 AM
I have a psychiatrist appointment in a couple of weeks, he is seeing me every 8 weeks at present to try get me stable.
I have EMDR tomorrow
Is it worth postponing EDMR?
Strugglingmum
11-09-23, 10:48 AM
I really dont want to as it's really the only option left to me to try and treat my condition. I didnt do it last appointment and I dont want to lose my spot. I really need to make it work
Fair enough, love. Just be kind to yourself today, please
Strugglingmum
11-09-23, 01:12 PM
Had a good walk in between the showers!
Spoke to my GP so he is going to inject my shoulder again in October
Strugglingmum
12-09-23, 04:47 PM
Another EMDR session when I actually didnt do any EMDR.
We talked about some stuff and she did ask if I thought this was the right time for EMDR to which I assured her it was as I don't want to lose my slot.
We are having another session next week and will try some EMDR and see how we go.
I need to get my act together so we actually manage to do it.
Anyway I had a good swim after to clear my head and have done some crochet so I'm nice and chill for BB tonight.
Sweetie, I know you don’t want to lose your slot, and completely understand that, but are you getting out of this process what you need to atm?
Are you going to be kind to you for the next day or so?
I agree with Paula. If you aren’t in the right place to take part in the program you aren’t going to get all you need out of it. I notice you stated earlier that you see this as your last option to get well and putting that kinda pressure on yourself isn’t going to help. I’m a strong believer that therapy is all about timing. You need to be in the right place to fully engage with any form of therapy and I’m wondering if this is the right time and place for you?
Strugglingmum
13-09-23, 09:21 AM
Ok so this is how I see it.
The thing that destabilises me is my PTSD symptoms. Yes they are bad at the moment
EMDR does not destabilise me further
EMDR is the way to process trauma
Therefore EMDR should help to decrease my symptoms and help me stabilise again.
Is it easy? No but it's what I need to do to heal
Fair enough. What does A and your therapist think?
Strugglingmum
14-09-23, 03:02 PM
We were at the hospital today at Pulmonary clinic to get A his CPAP machine. Hopefully he is going to feel a lot better soon
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