Anxiety & Depression Hell..*TRIGGERS*

[SA89]

I'm sorry for the offence I've caused & ye it was flippant but I was ed off yesterday, we all say things we regret. I've had rejection all my life & it hurts. I speak my mind maybe too much at times. Some of what I said has been misconstrued & this is why I hate text speak. I'm trying to be a better person but this isn't gonna happen overnight, I have a mountain to climb. It hurts that everything I've said positive on here to people is now seemingly dismissed or misinterpreted as "rude". Don't why I even bother tbh .

[Suzi]

I'm sorry for the offence I've caused & ye it was flippant but I was ed off yesterday, we all say things we regret. I've had rejection all my life & it hurts. I speak my mind maybe too much at times. Some of what I said has been misconstrued & this is why I hate text speak. I'm trying to be a better person but this isn't gonna happen overnight, I have a mountain to climb. It hurts that everything I've said positive on here to people is now seemingly dismissed or misinterpreted as "rude". Don't why I even bother tbh .

Thing is, you made some hideous comments in that post and there was no remorse at all - you could have sent a message to myself or any of the team saying that you made some comments that you wish you hadn't and could we help by editing your post, but you didn't. Honestly? I don't think that you would be apologising now if people hadn't commented and said how much you upset them.
Rejection? From here? That's utter b(llocks. We have always welcomed you, no matter what you say or how much we suggest things that you either do or don't act on. No one here has ever rejected you. I have never asked you not to speak your mind, just to be respectful of others and their struggles...
What exactly do you think has been misconstrued or misinterpreted as "rude"?
I just want to point out that you have no issues making yourself understood at all on here and you never have done since you stopped text speak

[SA89]

Thing is, you made some hideous comments in that post and there was no remorse at all - you could have sent a message to myself or any of the team saying that you made some comments that you wish you hadn't and could we help by editing your post, but you didn't. Honestly? I don't think that you would be apologising now if people hadn't commented and said how much you upset them.
Rejection? From here? That's utter b(llocks. We have always welcomed you, no matter what you say or how much we suggest things that you either do or don't act on. No one here has ever rejected you. I have never asked you not to speak your mind, just to be respectful of others and their struggles...
What exactly do you think has been misconstrued or misinterpreted as "rude"?
I just want to point out that you have no issues making yourself understood at all on here and you never have done since you stopped text speak

Suzi you've completely misinterpreted a lot of what I've said & you've done it again in that post. Apart from the suicide remark which was unnecessary of me, what hideous comments exactly did I make?. When I said your a trooper, I didn't mean that as condescending or sarcastic, I was genuinely interested in what motivated you to run this forum & you've completely took it the wrong way. Of course I respect others & their struggles because I'm going through the exact same as most on here. To say otherwise is suggesting my mental health isn't as bad as others.

I wasn't referring to rejection on here, I was referring to my life in general. This is exactly what I mean when I say you've taken things I've said out of context. I have as well at times & it's natural with texting (not text speak that's a different thing entirely). As the owner though, if you misinterpretate something it can have a ripple effect as your posts hold more weight as an administrator. And of course I've appreciated the support I've had on here.

Trying to be a better person is something commendable. And so worth striving for. It is understandable that yesterday may not have been the best day you could have. It would throw off a lot of us. And rejection stings. If its just or not. This is something we all understand. We all have had rejection and failures in our lives. Some we can not change and some that might be our own fault. But the one thing we all can control is how we react to this. And making comments to people that try to help is not helpful.

Speaking your mind is good. And you should always do that. But there are polite ways of doing it without getting these kind of reactions.

Thanks, I've always tried to relate my struggles to people on here as I'm aware it can help them too. It's comforting that people can identify with my loneliness, worry & deep despair. That's why I suggested maybe you could also try a meetup group like I'm trying atm for instance . I always strive to relate what I say to everyone else as I know that by being open, it can be reassuring to others who also suffer. If you look at all my posts you'll see that I've always made them relatable.

I'm the same in person as I wear my heart on my sleeve even in the face of adverse stigma I face in my household. I shout my struggles to the rooftop, don't care who knows lol . A lot of men would be ashamed of being so open but not me. I can see how implying I'd hang myself after a job rejection could be triggering. I'm very vulnerable so it wasn't entirely flippant. But I don't understand the other supposed hurtful comments I made. Apart from that rash remark, everything else has been misintepretrated which is very frustrating. I'm tired of being misunderstood but I guess that's part & parcel of mental health ..

[Suzi]

Suzi you've completely misinterpreted a lot of what I've said & you've done it again in that post.

In which case I apologise.

Apart from the suicide remark which was unnecessary of me, what hideous comments exactly did I make?.

There was more than one flippant comment re suicide. Again you implied that you didn't get the job due to discrimination, that you think that you were better than everyone else.

When I said your a trooper, I didn't mean that as condescending or sarcastic, I was genuinely interested in what motivated you to run this forum & you've completely took it the wrong way.

I apologise for taking it the wrong way, just that after your comment it felt as if you were continuing to be flippant...

Of course I respect others & their struggles because I'm going through the exact same as most on here. To say otherwise is suggesting my mental health isn't as bad as others.

Thing is, you don't appear to be doing everything you can to help yourself. Over the years you've had some brilliant advice about doing things such as getting up every day, speaking to your Dr, doing the 3 positives a day etc and even when you do follow it you revert straight back to staying in your room, and not continuing it. When you stopped your meds we suggested that instead of just stopping that you should go and talk things over with your GP - not even to get different ones (although that may have helped enormously) but just to tell them what you were doing and maybe getting more help in other ways. You didn't.
I'm not saying your mental health isn't "as bad" as anyone else's - I've never said that. In fact I think you're more likely to find many examples of me saying that whatever you are struggling with is as important and "as bad" as everyone else's because it's happening to you.

I wasn't referring to rejection on here, I was referring to my life in general. This is exactly what I mean when I say you've taken things I've said out of context. I have as well at times & it's natural with texting (not text speak that's a different thing entirely). As the owner though, if you misinterpretate something it can have a ripple effect as your posts hold more weight as an administrator. And of course I've appreciated the support I've had on here.

It wasn't only me who read it that way though....

I can see how implying I'd hang myself after a job rejection could be triggering. I'm very vulnerable so it wasn't entirely flippant. But I don't understand the other supposed hurtful comments I made. Apart from that rash remark, everything else has been misintepretrated which is very frustrating. I'm tired of being misunderstood but I guess that's part & parcel of mental health ..

It seems to have been "misinterpreted" by most of the other members of the forum, not just me though so obviously there was something "off" in the way you posted...

[Paula]

When I was growing up, particularly during my teen years, my dad had to say to me on a regular basis - it’s not what you say, it’s the way you say it. As I’ve grown up, I’ve tried to remember that as I interact with everyone in my life. It’s not easy for me and I’ve failed far too many times, because my natural instinct is to say exactly how I feel, but I’m grateful to him for teaching me that. Online, it should in theory be easier as I’ve got the opportunity to look at what I’m saying before I post (though even then I do get it wrong sometimes) and I try to consider how I’d feel if someone had said that to me.

I’m sure you don’t mean to upset or anger people but, looking at all the comments that have been posted over the last few days, it’s clear that many members are seeing what you say very differently to what you mean them to see. Perhaps, then, taking some time to look over your comments before posting, and more closely consider the impact they could have on other members, could mean they’d be misinterpreted less often?