Hi and welcome. I’m another one who can identify with your wife. I’m disabled with multiple health issues, and I struggle with significant mental health issues - which are under control at the moment but can start from something as simple as starting a new medication for something unrelated to MH.

My husband is also working from home at the moment and it’s become very easy for both of us to let him do a lot more for me and around the house. It’s quicker, involves less pain for me and he likes looking after me. And I get that covid has made it easier to make excuses why not to do things - I still haven’t been to the supermarket, or even picked up my own meds, as I’m really anxious about that. In fact, my only trips out of the house in the last month have been to the hospital.

But you’re right, this isn’t healthy for your wife, or for you and your daughter. And it sounds like she needs help that you can’t provide - from her GP or a mental health professional. Is she still in pain with her hip and ankle and, if so, (and I know this sounds weird) is it worse when she’s particularly struggling with her mental health? That’s something I’ve noticed happens a lot to me. Does your GP surgery offer something like a wellness check with the practice nurse? Perhaps that would be a gentle way to encourage her to start talking, especially if you contact the surgery in advance to let them know your particular concerns.

Also, what sort of support do you have? Caring from someone with multiple health conditions is hard physically and mentally. Maybe you could think about accessing support?