If you could change your job today, what would you want to change it to?
If you could change your job today, what would you want to change it to?
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
Good question and something I've been very indecisive about. If we are talking absolute dream job then it would be to own and run my own gym, that makes me smile even imagining it. Realistically though my finances are way off that. Without getting into insults or whose at fault for what, I put a car on finance in my name for my partner. Her credit history was appalling and she would have been rejected so I signed and of course the agreement was that she would pay monthly for it. She didn't keep up with the repayments and I was blacklisted and cannot get a loan anywhere. God knows I've tried. I know I was very naive in doing this but I just was trying to help my partner. I have to be honest and say this is something I'm very bitter about to this day.
The other option was a sports psychology degree at the OU, it covers all the science of sport which I'm very interested in, nutrition and of course the mindset of competitive sportspeople. The problem here is that on average it takes around 6 years to complete, my motivation as said is shot and I'm just stuck in a very negative tunnel vision at the moment.
I know I only have myself to blame for this. My brother has tried to motivate me, my partner, just nothing is going in and its incredibly frustrating because I know it's down to me to help myself.
I'm doing a psychology with counselling degree. Part time would be one module a year and around 15 hours work a week. I've found the psychology tutors to be excellent so far and really supportive. And spreading it out enables you to still work. It might be worth speaking to someone there about your worries?
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That's the point the OU looks a fantastic option it really does but it still leaves me with the problem of being in this job I can't stand anymore. I have no quals so all other jobs I've searched for are ones I've done and made me unhappy (warehouse, bar work etc) even worse is that many are agency/zero hour contracts. At least here, as much as I hate it, I am contracted and guaranteed a wage every fortnight. I know the real answer is to get myself properly educated but its having that get up and go to go and do it. I just feel really apathetic and down at the moment (well, for a while in truth) and I'm just finding it incredibly hard to break this cycle.
Not being able to drive sums it up perfectly. The obvious answer is well Ryan, book your lessons and get learning! I don't even have the motivation to do this.
Have you looked into adult education? Often the classes are in the evening or on the weekend? Or what about the recovery college?
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
So maybe the answer is to address how you're feeling first?
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Yeah it could possibly be. There's just so much going on its very overwhelming. After what you've all said which I massively appreciate I know I have to try and stop these feelings of shame and self-loathing with myself first. Even if I got a job interview Im not exactly giving off the best impression lol. Will let you all know how I get on hopefully but if anything it has felt OK talking about it and I appreciate everyone's input
Things can get better with the right help and support lovely, it's just a case of finding out what that is for you
Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro
I'm so glad that talking has helped lovely... Keep talking.
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
Well today has been horrendous. I apologise if anyone feels down by this but this is the only platform I feel comfortable to speak on.
Obviously mentally I'm not in a good place right now and while I'm not going to use this to sling mud or throw insults I really feel like I have almost no support from my partner at all. I can't tell my brother or mum everything as my mum is very ill at the moment and the stress would make her worse and I don't want to worry my brother either, he has a family of his own. My partner is the only one who knows everything. I totally accept I'm not the easiest person to live with at the moment and I don't expect anyone to pander to me, however I do expect support as I have and would support her.
When I first made this post yes I was having suicidal thoughts, I can't lie, I broke down that same day and of course my partner sat there and listened. Literally around 5-10 mins after, she was tapping away on her phone and went off to ferry a dog to another house (it wasn't work or anything, she was doing a favour). A similar thing happened today.
Am I right to feel unsupported? Honest opinions please if anyone would like to answer. I certainly know the world doesn't stop on my account and everyone has to get on with their lives but I can't help feeling this was a bit heartless 2bh. I don't know, maybe my mental state is making me have a skewed vision of things. I really feel right now it's best we split up and I live alone and try to help myself first but then of course I'm wondering am I just being too sensitive because of how things are at the moment?
Sorry for the negative rant to anyone who may read this I just really needed to get this off my chest.