I promise you it won't always feel like this. How do we know? Because we have been there and still go there at times. At the minute you probably feel like telling everyone to sod off but keep doing those things because they are normal and some day you'll realise that they are not such a chore and that yes, it does feel good to have clean hair or to drink coffee with a friend and smile at something she has said. My CPN kept telling me to keep doing the little things because eventually they make a difference, like chipping away at a wall. Some days will be better than others. At the moment you are so exhausted with no sleep that it's hard to imagine these little things making a difference. You are not doing them for other people, you are doing them for You, to fight, to get well. Sometimes we need someone to nag us to do them but it's for us. To get us well. To keep us well. And as ever, don't be hard on yourself. Be kind to you. See how big a thing you did today. I am so so proud of you. You Can keep fighting cause you got us to cheer you on as well as your friends/family/HTT. Love you. X