I think that's all I am scared about Suzi... All of the things we planned for the future now seem so far away because he doesn't feel well enough (understandably) ... And I don't know if I would be able to cope with the rest of my life with everyday how it has been because I miss what we had..

Today he made a negative comment about himself and I tried my best to be positive with him.. He said things like it not being fair on me and how I've always had to "deal with his crap".. I told him that it didn't matter and that there are times when he has had to and will have to do the same if not more for me.. When he said he won't get better I tried to reassure him in the way Paula said and told him it's too soon and we've tried too little to say he won't recover...

I kept telling him how I believe in him and I believe he will get better and how in sickness and in health I still love him...

I hope those are the right types of things to say...