I've suggested marriage counselling many times but he always refused. It's how I ended up going on my own.

Thanks - I am sad - I guess everything happens for a reason etc etc but I just struggle at the moment with trying to understand everything. You never think it will happen to you!!

I don't know what I want to do, and I feel so bad about that. He is such a lovely man, but I don't know if I love him the same way any more.