Saw the OT again today. My blood test results were all okay again. She said this is remarkable! So the weight gain and the bloods being okay means no hospital for me!
She also said to me that she believes me that my problem IS depression because of how I speak and behave and she said when she saw me eat the other day, my behaviours were very different to someone with an eating disorder. That said, obviously I have issues with my eating and she has a duty of care to make sure the eating disorder doesn't seep in too much. She's also happy with the notion of me going to this gardening project, doing the reflexology course and getting a part time job. So it's good we're on the same page for now. Perhaps I can start to dread my meetings with her a little less now!

My mood has unfortunately been down-on-the-floor RUBBISH. Guess I've got to just accept that and go with the flow until the tablets kick in. Still, I went out with my dad for a few hours and bought him a coffee. I also bought myself a book and spent half hour on the piano, and I ordered some terracotta pots and acryllic paints to paint them ready for Christmas gifts! I feel pretty bored and lonely. Bit of a catch 22 situation because whilst I don't have much motivation to do things and whilst I seem to feel lonely and bored no matter what I do, doing nothing at all makes the depression worse.

So as for tonight, I'm doing an online support group and then taking a walk by the beach before watching something on TV and reading a few pages of this new book. Small victories.