Hi folks. Hope you're all OK.

I eventually went to my sister's for Xmas. It was OK but I was never relaxed there. Had a lot of constant anxiety and coped by drinking. I just can't stop ruminating over negative things. I cannot control it. I've been so anxious all day barely unable to move from the sofa on the edge of tears too. Really coming apart. I'll try and get to my GP but my motivation is so low now. I'm beginning to not care anymore. I think the alcohol has diminished the efficacy of my ADs so am going to go on the wagon for a while. I feel just so sensitive to anything that goes wrong or criticisms. It's like my self esteem is like an eggshell. I'm lost..