Anxiety & Depression Hell..*TRIGGERS*

[SA89]

sorry ye I meant Stephen (damn auto-type ), I'm taken aback by how inspiring this wonderful young man was. I was referrin to our typical 'every-day' moaning not people who have legitimate reasons to moan. Basically the type on facebook that whine & complain & beg for attention. That constant self-centred neediness is embarrassing when u see the self-lessness of that young man.

Its always the nicest people that suffer the worst & that really upsets me. The prospect of death really frightens me I'm not gonna lie, however inevitable. When ur depressed that deep rooted fear intensifies. The world becomes such a bleak picture that u struggle to look past the worst things imaginable .

[SA89]

Sorry for the double post (delete this if its forbidden) but does any1 else feel more 'lonely' during the summer? . When ur a recluse summers the absolute worst time I find along with Christmas. I feel like I have to be somewhere to make the most of it which is easier said than done when u've no circle to socialise in. I have a walk round town sometimes but its not the same. Every1 seems to be doing something sociable all the time, they always seem to have plans with friends.

[rose]

I find Christmas and other 'happy times' very difficult but I must say something I always find cheers me up is summer.
You don't need to be socialising to enjoy it, just sitting in your garden with a book or having a walk in the park is so simple yet so lovely.
I am definitely a summer person!

[Suzi]

You could always try asking some of your friends to meet somewhere etc..

[SA89]

ye I go out with my cousin clubbin 1ce a week & the same thing happens over & over; she buggers off with some guy, I stay in town for a bit (feelin like a twat talkin to strangers) then I go home with my tail between my legs. I've just been now actually & its the last fkn time I go until I form legitimate friends of my own. Guys will no doubt relate to this, its the same thing ever year.

We're expected to go out & party every week but u have to be really, really in the mood to dance with strangers. I start off spirited but then depression quickly settles in, triggered by feelin completely lost in a crowd of jubilants. These constant disapointing nights contribute to my low self esteem i'd say ..

[Paula]

So why do you keep doing it? I don't mean that aggressively, I really would like to know why. Is it because you don't like the thought of not going out, or because you don't know what other options there are?

[Westin]

Why not fill your nights with things you enjoy then? If you know you're setting yourself up for a trigger, do something else.

[Suzi]

Totally agree with Westin.. I've never been a lover of clubbing etc so I did something different..

[SA89]

ye pretty much the thought of stayin in on a weekend.. especially at summer/christmas. Its every1s favourite past-time on my fb etc so its kinda the natural thing to do. The alternative is stayin in on a weekend which I do everyday. When I'm out though my self-esteem is exposed in a place full of strangers. I'm an attractive guy apparently but i'm ridiculously short! (5'3-'4) .

Even in Turkey last year, despite the lush setting my mood was still overwhelmingly low. I've broken down in tears several times in restaurants/pub toilets etc .. I'm constantly riddled with insecurity - prospects, lack of relationships, low self-image etc. I'm percieved as a 'gd lad' with a gd sense of humour but behind the curtain I'm so unhappy with this miserable life I lead ..

[Paula]

I'm saying this with the proviso that I've never done this, though know of people who do. Have you ever considered joining one of those groups that arrange outings, doing all sorts of different things, where you can meet like minded people without any pressure? I wonder if it might take you out of the mindset that all there is to do at the weekend is clubbing, which you don't like.