Thank you Mira, I can relate to everything you said . I attended 3 interviews this week (Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday) and gave a good account of myself. I'm very good at articulating myself but I stumbled slightly on the 3rd interview with a few questions. I didn't sleep either but pushed myself to attend all 3. I've also took the initiative to put myself forward for a few meetup hangouts. Its with a group from the meetup app and they arrange outings on a weekly basis. This Saturday I'm penciled in for games & lunch from 2-5. They arrange things like comedy clubs, pub quiz', bars etc. It'll be surreal because not only are they strangers but they're around 20+ years older than me. But I'm going regardless & I've also applied for lots of voluntary as I'd like to get back into it. I hope this has given you food for thought to maybe try yourself? .
I feel marginally better when I've been out in the sun to appointments like I've done this week. Even if it's a brief respite from my room it's a positive step in the right direction. Right now I feel a bit more hopeful but I need to connect that hope with tangible results (ie social outings, some form of work routine), otherwise I'll fall back down into that pit of despair which I've done time & time again. I'm sure we can all relate to that . That's the tricky part that I've always struggled with, finding a routine and sustaining it. Despite my relative progress this week I still feel "emotionless". How do you rekindle a bright spark that's long since been burnt out?. Please don't tell me pills are the answer ..