Dealing with Depression & Anxiety again

[julie14046]

To be honest, I don't know why I stopped taking them. It started off missing a dose here and there a few months back and then I just stopped probably over xmas & new year and then I would think oh I should take one. I got it into my head that maybe they were causing my restless legs and I was so exhausted, I just wanted to sleep but I've ended up back in this dark place. I spoke to my GP last week over the phone and she prescribed me propanolol for anxiety and to keep taking my anti-d's. I asked for oxazepam bcos they really helped last time but she wouldn't give me them due to dependency (i've never got addicted to them). She said propanalol do the same job but not addcitive.

[Paula]

Hi, love, and welcome. So, re introducing your ADs will be the same as when you first starting taking them. It’ll take a couple of months to really feel the benefit. I know right now that feels like forever, but you won’t get to a better place until you’re taking them exactly as prescribed. I know how you feel. I’m about your age and have struggled since I was 16. I’ve been on meds permanently for years but a little while ago I had a horrendous stomach bug and my meds weren’t digested. I became very ill. It was awful for about 6 months but taking the meds and looking after myself eventually helped me feel a lot better. And, hunni, that’s what you need to do.

Part of looking after yourself means stopping your guilt trip. Your children love you, your granddaughter is at the age when she’ll love getting to know you. None of them will be better off without you, I promise. And stop beating yourself up for stopping the meds - it happened, you’ve realised what went wrong, you spoke to your doctor, you’re doing what the doctor wants you to do right now. You’re on the right path.

Just as an aside, when did the restless legs start?

[julie14046]

Thanks so much for your reply. I needed to hear that, the negative thoughts are relentless and every time I try to be positive, that voice is there saying "what's the point", it's driving me nuts! But I take my tablets every day, I try to use the coping mechanisms that worked before, it's just exhausting. The restless legs started a few years back and gradually got worse to the point I'd have no sleep at all some nights. The docs gave me codeine but then after a while they wouldn't give them to me anymore (addicitve). I was on venlafaxine 8 years ago but the doc had to take me off them as they caused high blood pressure and I feel it was around that time the restless legs started too.