Ok so I’m really not in a good place right now. Last night when the aspie lot left the pub a stayed a little while on my own and was close to tears. Today I went out for lunch and again find myself fighting back tears. My head is all over the place and I’m totally overwhelmed.

I’ve been a complete idiot taking on so much lately and now I’m paying the price. Everything around me has gone to shit and I can’t face dealing with it all now. I know I have a habit of pushing myself to do things but this time I really have gone to far. I’ve not been sleeping, I’ve skipped m meds, Talia isn’t getting the attention and care she deserves, I’ve not seen the cleaners for a month, the house is a mess, I seem to constantly piss people off without meaning to I don’t think anyone understands just how upsetting that is for me too. I have been so busy trying to fulfill my commitments I’ve not even had time to write my boys letter for last month and I hate myself for that. I can’t think straight and I feel so broken and useless and I don’t even know why I’m telling you here cos I feel like I’ve screwed up with you all and if I just disappeared nobody would really miss me.