Annoyingly, as always, Paula is right. She speaks sense and she understands as she's going in for 4 weeks for her pain course... At the end of the day hunni, I hate to be blunt, but if you are so low you are having such dark thoughts then surely it's best you get the help and get stable rather than not and ending up hurting yourself - or worse? I promise you they'd all rather you went and got the help now.
