Hi and welcome. I've added a trigger warning as you mention suicide. It's nothing to worry about, it's just so people can avoid your thread if it would trigger them.

Can I ask what meds you have tried? Have you had any counselling or are you still waiting? Did you try talking to those running the anxiety group or did you just stop attending? Even if you did it via email? The problem is mental health services are severely understaffed and under funded so they don't really have the capacity to chase after people who don't attend. You have to shout to get the help you need. It's taken me 10 years to get the help I needed.

There is always a reason to carry on, it just sometimes takes a while to see it, but we're a friendly group and will support you as much as we can.