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Thread: Struggling with my partner - no feelings

  1. #11
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Have you spoken to him about you thinking she might not be right? Marc saw 4 or so different CPNs 4 psychs and 3 counsellors until he found the right one who literally changed our lives completely.
    Please always remember that I am always right. I have a framed certificate to prove it.

    When in doubt, stop and think... WWSS? (What Would Suzi Say?)
    For more info please see
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  2. #12
    I have mentioned it a few times yes. He's signed up to another 5 sessions so he says he's going to see how he feels after that's done.

    I felt it from the start though that she wasn't the right one but I didn't want to make it seem like I was managing things, so I didn't go too strong on it.

    What type of therapy worked best for Marc?

    When I talk about things too much he said he find it smothering and pushes me away more. He says I make it worse and talking all the time feels like constant pressure. He hates it when get upset/cry too. He can't deal with that. I get that. It's just difficult sometimes as I'm finding this very hard.

    He's trying to make friends in his new work and signing up to lots of things which I think is great but it's also making me sad in a selfish way almost that I wish he would try with us. I have said this to him and he said he has no feelings to want to try and that he doesn't know what to do. I keep asking him if he wants 'us' and he says yes so I can only go by this.

  3. #13
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Can I be honest? Sweetheart I put my whole life on hold and walking on eggshells and making the kids do the same. Don't fall into the same trap I did. Plan to do things with the kids, go out! Go on picnics and woodland adventures. Go out and meet people for coffee etc. If he can do it then why can't you?
    Please always remember that I am always right. I have a framed certificate to prove it.

    When in doubt, stop and think... WWSS? (What Would Suzi Say?)
    For more info please see
    THIS thread


  4. #14
    I do I see friends often. It helps but it's not changed things in here.

    He just sees it that he has no feelings for me so it's over. He doesn't even want to wait and see what effect stopping the meds does today now he says

  5. #15
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Would it help if you wrote it down for him? Maybe then he’d be able to understand things from your perspective.

    Has he considered grief counselling?
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

  6. #16
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    I have to say I'm struggling to see why the doctor would just agree to him coming off the meds without swapping to something if he's still showing symptoms of depression and that actually he doesn't seem any better. Swapping to another Anti D yes, but stopping?
    Has the doctor talked him through stopping? Just stopping cold turkey is not something that is recommended. Also noting that 30mg of fluoxetine isn't the highest dose, but if he's emotionally numb then the option of changing sounds sensible... There are so many other ones though, it's definitely worth trying another...
    Please always remember that I am always right. I have a framed certificate to prove it.

    When in doubt, stop and think... WWSS? (What Would Suzi Say?)
    For more info please see
    THIS thread


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