Hi lavender and welcome to DWD. First, I’ve amended the trigger warning you kindly put on your post as you’ve also discussed abuse.

I’m so sorry, hunni, you’ve had a terrible time. When was the last time you spoke to your doctor and when was the last time you had any sort of treatment? Have you received counselling from someone who specialises in sexual abuse? Has anyone mentioned CBT to you?

Sorry for all the questions