Maybe you need to take the emphasis away from him and focus, as Paula has suggested on you. What about ice cream and a movie, or a hot bath or a good night in/out with some girlfriends?
Maybe you need to take the emphasis away from him and focus, as Paula has suggested on you. What about ice cream and a movie, or a hot bath or a good night in/out with some girlfriends?
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
So I'll leave him a few days I think, then see how I feel and take Suzi's advice. I have always been an advocate of communication. I know no one is perfect with it at all times but airing things out always helps and I'm just so hurt that he's pushing me away when he knows this. It feels to me like maybe he's never had that before and now he has got it he doesn't know what to do with it.
I'm worried about him. He stubborn and independent on the surface but when he is low I know he needs someone.
Communication is very important but, sometimes, we end up saying the same thing to each other over and over and a little space can help. I know it hurts, lovely, but I also know that, when I was pushing my husband away, I didn’t want to or mean to. Eventually I realised what I was doing and I’m sure your other half will too
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
I think it's the not knowing that's confusing me, he hasn't actually said break up, but used the word space which can mean so much. I am trying to focus on me. I will be going to the gym a bit next week and I have a lunch date Monday and Tuesday....its the down time when I'd normally talk to him that hard. Sounds silly but I ripped his valentines card up earlier and threw the roses away he got me....I can't bare to see them. Everything is making me hurt. I do feel like he is pushing me away, but when you did it to your husband did you want him to try or not or did you not know?
Apologies if you do not wish to answer-.gif ")")
Oh wow. Tbh, there were times I was so ill I felt absolutely nothing except pain. He was unbelievably patient with me and never let me feel like I was a burden.
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
Thanks Paula, I appreciate it. I am always patient, I'm trying, I have never seen him as a burden and I tell him that. I think that is why I feel so bad I reacted this way, but I needed him to know how I felt.....is that me being selfish?
Not at all. There’s two of you in this relationship
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
Should I let him contact me or would he need me to reach out to him?
I think you said it yourself, give him a few days ....
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
Thanks ladies I'll keep you posted
Paula (17-02-18)
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