Actually I'm going to disagree with Stella on this... I think you should write the letter - you need to get it out of your head and actually I think you might be partially right in what you are saying.
I still vividly recall the time when my now husband said to me that he didn't know if he loved me or not. He knew he had loved me before he had a breakdown, and he couldn't see why it would have changed, but he didn't know how he felt there and then. He also didn't know if he was hungry or thirsty so I just switched on autopilot and made him food and a drink when I was doing something for anyone else.
I told him that I loved him enough for both of us. Smothering? Maybe...

Don't leave the forum over 1 post lovely.. We aren't all going to agree all the time..