Hey, missjames98

I agree with what some of the people here have said - you should possibly think about going back to your doctor and discussing the dosage, the medication itself and the possibility of counselling.

As far as the old you goes, this is something that I struggle with myself. In my case, maybe in others, I was diagnosed relatively young (in my early 20s). When one is young, the world seems like a very different place (it did to me, at least) and I think that there is a tendency to think that our condition or the medications we use to treat it are what has caused our world view to change. I am certain that this has some effect - how could it not? - but I also think that we change as people as we move through our life. We see things as they are, not through the rose tinted lenses that youth can provide, and we long for that lost innocence to come back. Unfortunately, we cannot reclaim it - a pill can't do it, counselling can't do it. We are, at this moment, the person we are at this moment. We can never again be the person we were one second ago, leave alone in years past. The most we can do, in my experience, is make the best of who we are in this moment, and every moment after it. That is something that pills and counselling can help with, but, in the end, you have to let the person you were go and be who you are now.

I do hope that this doesnt sound patronising - its certainly not meant to be, its not something that anyone finds easy as far as I know. But if you hang on to the person you were, you can end up poisoning the person you are and the person that you have the potential to become.

I hope this makes some sort of sense to you and that you find some measure of peace in the present and the future.

T