Carl few days.

Anniversary of our relationship starting today. 4 years ago on the 10th we found out she was pregnant. Exciting and wonderful times. Was on top of the world then.

Spent the last few days just constantly reminiscing wishing so much I could turn back the clock.

Counselling seems like a waste of time. I'm getting no answers and I feel as bad now as I have ever done. I'm up to 45mg of mitrazapine. Life is just such a drag.