Husband suffering with depression. *AB SU TRIGGERS

[Paula]

Hi and welcome. I'm so sorry for your loss . I need to say that having depression is no excuse for treating your loved ones badly. Given you've very recently suffered a miscarriage, these demands seem to be, to me, insensitive - 2 weeks is no time for you to recover, physically and emotionally.

Are you involved with his doctors at all? Does he let you in to any discussions about diagnosis? Has he talked to you about any triggers, coping mechanisms etc and is he on any medication? I think it's important, where possible, that partners are involved in these conversations/decisions etc as it helps to give a better understanding of how the illness is affecting him and what can be done to help

[Blueeyes1983]

Thank you everyone for your responses.

[Blueeyes1983]

He said he will see his GP next week. I am thinking about getting counselling for myself too. He is not currently on any medication. He has twice been on fluoxetine but he said it didn't help and made him feel 'fuzzy headed'.

I totally agree that his demands were unreasonable, I was extremely hurt and livid. That's what is hard, he just acts
like a different person completely. Afterwards he said he hates himself for sounding like he was pressuring me into
doing something I didn't want to do. He admits that he uses sex to cheer himself up. He said he 'doesn't even know what he is doing' when his moods are like this. He did say he sometimes says things to hurt me so that I will leave him and find 'someone better'.

Afterwards me apologised profusely, said he loves me, wants a family with me etc..I between these episodes he is very kind and loving. I feel like this could be a mood disorder more than a general depression. On his 'good days' he acts normally (if there is such a thing), laughs, jokes, keep busy, altho an element of sadness and lack of self esteem still seems to be there. wouldn't say that he has any manic phases tho.