Setback *Triggers* *SU SH triggers*

[JustEM]

Hey Suzi Thank you!

I don't know why I didn't post. I had the thoughts around 'I don't want to be a burden' and such. Silly, I know, but there we are. Now I've vented!

We're all hoping that the medication will lift my mood and that from there other things will help too and then the eating will improve. Time will tell!

Yeah, I always have to have a few positive goals even if they seem to be getting smaller and more basic (but still always realistic) as time goes by! And the recovery centre is a positive safety net, yeah. Hopefully I won't need it but the way I see it... If I go there or even if I am admitted to hospital, it's because I NEED to be there, right?

But I'm in a better place tonight than I was last night and this morning so that's a good thing. Thankfully, I have a wonderful and supportive family around me. Things would otherwise have become a hell of a lot worse for me.

I hope you're doing as well as you can be, Suzi. Thanks for always posting back. It means a lot. xx

[Suzi]

You are working hard and that's immensely important and shows how desperate you are to get well. I'm proud of you lovely.

[JustEM]

Thanks Suzi.

I do feel pretty desperate to get well, yeah... It is a positive that I'm not giving up. I can't just give up.

I think we just have a way of dealing with what comes our way.

Thanks for always being so positive and encouraging xx

[Suzi]

I try
Thing is, you're the one doing all the hard work. All I'm doing is waving pompoms and doing motivational chanting on the sidelines lovely.

[JustEM]

Yes, but sometimes Suzi it's all that pompom waving and motivational chanting that can make all the difference!

Met my care plan co-coordinator last week anyways and she came to the house yesterday to write my care plan with me. She's really nice and very pro-active. I like her and feel I can trust her.

I've been on 50mg sertraline for a week. Early days yet but no nasty side effects. I certainly feel more energised and seem to have responded well to them so far.

Have been keeping myself busy as always taking beach walks, spending time with family and enjoying time at a local spa pool! I'm definitely going back to swim and the spa more regularly as it's a real de-stresser and mood-booster for me! I've definitely been more motivated this last week too with gardening, doing chores, ironing and even fruit-picking!

Looking to slowly get back to volunteering and hope to start a course in reflexology at college one night a week starting in a couple of weeks. Gently-gently! The future seems more positive but I'm still looking day to day.

CPN care coordinator is arranging DBT or CBT therapy sessions for me through the tier 2 service. I should get an initial appointment in a couple of weeks. The therapist will be able to provide me with a set block of 12 sessions on what she feels I need to focus on, e.g. low self-confidence and depression.

The OT is back off leave from the eating disorder services. I get my blood test results back tomorrow and hopefully all will be well with those. She's coming out to see me on Monday so we can catch up then.

So all in all, things are better than last time I posted!

Hope everything is as good as it can be with you all!

[Paula]

You've achieved loads! Well done

Before I became really ill, I was a Holistic Therapist inc reflexology. It's incredible hard work but so rewarding. The only thing I will say is you need to create a bubble around yourself to stop soaking in all your clients negativity. It takes practise and I wasn't very good at it which wasn't a problem until my MH worsened.

[JustEM]

Thanks Paula!

Wow being a holistic therapist sounds great. I actually love massage therapy and spending time at the spa and personally it's something that helps relax me and helps my mental health. A lot of my family say that I'm very good at giving massages too! So I was thinking it may be something that I'd actually like to do. There's a full time course in complementary therapy starting at a local university next year and there's an open day in October. I'm no way near ready for full time enrollment now! But it would be a great thing to work for. In the meantime, the reflexology would be a little thing for me (and for my fellow massage-loving family members who I'm sure would want me to try it out on them haha! )

Thanks for the advise though. What you mean by clients negativity? Just the way they acted or?

xx

[Paula]

Most clients come for help. And their emotions pour out of them in their body language, voice, muscles etc. It's so easy to take that on and hard to let go of

[Paula]

I'm not trying to put you off at all, keeping that barrier is a skill to be learnt, that's all

[JustEM]

Ah no, not at all Paula! That's good advice and something definitely to be aware of! Thanks xx
I'll be aware of keeping that barrier, I have enough problems of my own lol