View Full Version : The final stretch
Jaquaia
20-10-20, 12:26 PM
Currently sat in a tutorial listening to the tutors introducing themselves so thought the title seemed fitting!
Introductory tutorial and one thing that has been hammered home is the need to practice self care due to the triggering subject matter so I may need reminding of that occasionally...
OO We're good at that - especially Paula on a Thursday on the FB Page ;)
OldMike
20-10-20, 01:53 PM
Yup Paula and Suzi are both good at reminding people about self care ;)
Can I take a moment and say how amazed I am about you?not going to wait for an anwser so here it comes.
I am amazed!
Seeing how you are dealing with everything. I can only tip my hat and do that 50 times.
When I read about your grandes and percentages I am in awe. And that with all thats been going on. There are a lot of strong women here on this forum and you are so much a part of that group. You keep on going and inspire the rest of us along the way.
Jaquaia
20-10-20, 05:06 PM
Mira, I just try my best, it's all I can do really!
I need to be more aware of self care this year as it's a seriously heavy module. For example, I can choose to do one of my assessments on self-harm and suicide, so not exactly light-hearted and that's no even the most challenging of topics I'll be studying so going to try and remind myself that it's ok to need support...
It's TOTM, started with really bad stomach cramps halfway through my tutorial and stupidly decided to tough it out until it had finished. I'm now medicated and have finished week 3 of one module, going to do a little bit more tonight then Harry Potter and sewing I think!
Stella180
20-10-20, 06:47 PM
You mention Harry Potter, did anyone know that Asda are the movies 2 for £8 so £40 for the full set including fantastic beasts.
Jaquaia
20-10-20, 06:57 PM
We have all of them apart from the latest Fantastic Beasts
Stella180
20-10-20, 07:02 PM
I happened to notice which hanging around for an hour and a half waiting for my meds on Sunday. The crimes of Grindlewald is the only one I’ve not seen but I wasn’t a huge fan of its predecessor so not been in a rush to see it.
Jaquaia
20-10-20, 07:03 PM
I've not seen it yet either but it's on Now TV so might give it a go
Seen all and actually preferred Grindelwald to Fantastic Beasts.
Jaquaia
20-10-20, 08:08 PM
Painkillers have worn off, I was upstairs running J a bath for when he got home from work and before he got in it he's made sure I had more pain killers! I may have to keep him!
Jaquaia
20-10-20, 08:42 PM
He's a good one, he always tries to look after me (inlove)
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 1... the ending makes me cry every bloody time!!!
How are you today? What's on the plan for today?
He's a good one, he always tries to look after me (inlove)
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 1... the ending makes me cry every bloody time!!!
Oh absolutely. You’ll be surprised to hear it makes me cry too ....
Stella180
21-10-20, 09:14 AM
I’d be surprised to hear that didn’t lol
And me... to making me cry and to not being surprised at Paula...
Jaquaia
21-10-20, 09:25 AM
How are you today? What's on the plan for today?
Dragging my arse out of bed will be a good start! Changing our bed, hoovering as we seem to have half the cat all over our carpet, popping to the shop, studying and tutorial tonight.
Erm, should you be doing all that if you're in pain?
Jaquaia
21-10-20, 11:23 AM
It's stomach cramp, I find it helps moving and I've taken ibuprofen. It will be fine in a day or so!
Jaquaia
21-10-20, 12:49 PM
The Battle of Hogwarts ;(;(;(;(
And it's not even started yet, they're just protecting the castle
I’m choking up and am not even watching it!
Jaquaia
21-10-20, 01:13 PM
I've decided to take a break and do some studying or I'm going to be a wreck. There's so much that gets me in this film
OMG feeling that emotionalness from here! It always makes me cry too!
Jaquaia
21-10-20, 01:48 PM
It's the only film that consistently makes me cry and the only book that has ever made me sob. I was absolutely blown away the first time I read it.
If you want a book that makes you sob, try Dawn French’s new one Because of You...
I love her books, but I'm still cross with "According to yes" where the main character did something I really didn't think she would....
Jaquaia
21-10-20, 07:18 PM
Will have to look at that one!
Not even 20 minutes in to my tutorial and I'm bored already! Though the tutor has a nice voice ;)
Oh no! Boredom is a nightmare!
Jaquaia
21-10-20, 08:24 PM
The middle bit was more interesting and my tutor is im this tutorial and seems lovely :)
Jaquaia
24-10-20, 04:18 PM
This is how I've spent my day...
https://www.dropbox.com/s/lr55l21a2ymda5s/20201024_160416.jpg?raw=1
Looks like so much fun! :)
Jaquaia
24-10-20, 09:42 PM
The next door neighbour organised a Halloween trail for the kids to follow instead of trick or treat and talked J into it today!
OldMike
25-10-20, 08:33 AM
Teehee I'm glad you're keeping Halloween's traditions going. :)
Jaquaia
02-11-20, 10:52 AM
It's 10 to 11. I've had no breakfast, no drink and no meds. I have an essay due in 2 days that I haven't even started and I just can't be bothered.
Stella180
02-11-20, 10:54 AM
Do I have to kick you to get your arse into gear? Come on, you can do it.
Jaquaia
02-11-20, 11:10 AM
I've moved. Knackered now though. It's ridiculous!
Strugglingmum
02-11-20, 12:04 PM
(panda)
Stella can kick your arse. I'll send you a hug. X
What's causing your exhaustion love? Is it arthritis or mental stuff?
(panda) have you done the necessary stuff yet?
Jaquaia
02-11-20, 01:32 PM
Done the necessary stuff, even done the kids lunches for tomorrow. Printed out some tutorial slides, sat down to start my essay and just staring at the page. So it's going well!
No idea Suzi, a bit of both I think.
How's it going? Can you ask for an extension if you need to?
Jaquaia
02-11-20, 06:30 PM
I have until Saturday. I was honest and told my tutor that we'd had J's kids for the majority of half term, I'd had to do caring bits for my mum and fatigue had massively kicked in. I've also told him that stress is a trigger for flares for me and an extension would ease that a little.
J has picked up that I'm struggling today and he was alseep until this afternoon as he was on nights last night so apparently it's obvious... I didn't sleep well last night either so that hasn't helped either.
So what's going on in your head? Why aren't you talking about it?
Jaquaia
02-11-20, 08:17 PM
I don't know.
What? You don't know what is going on or you don't know why you aren't talking about it?
Jaquaia
02-11-20, 08:34 PM
Both. I've just had enough today and I don't know why
Oh lovely, have some love and hugs (panda) (bear) (panda) (bear)
Is there anything I can do to help?
Jaquaia
02-11-20, 09:03 PM
I don't know. My mood is just pretty flat today and my head isn't in the right place to tackle my essay so going to do some knitting.
Sometimes you just have to put it to one side.. Most importantly sometimes you need to be kind to you. Sounds like you're still trying to do so much for everyone and you are getting a bit left behind.....
Jaquaia
02-11-20, 09:15 PM
I can't even be bothered to read
Stella180
02-11-20, 10:25 PM
I can't even be bothered to read
Now I’m really worried.
Sounds to me like you're doing too much! Easily done. Kind of agree with suzi....you're looking after everyone else but you. Didn't you just put a TMA in a week or so ago? Don't forget that you're a Mum, daughter, partner and trying to do degrees at the same time.....that's a helluva big ask! Plus lockdown again......how about a takeout for all of you tonight, go out for a walk in the countryside and let your thoughts wander ( I get my best ideas when walking) sod the housework, it ain't going anywhere. Give your head a day off...24hrs isn't going to do any damage to what you feel you have to do.(panda)
Hey love, how are you this morning?
Morning, sweetie, hope today’s a bit brighter (bear)
Jaquaia
03-11-20, 08:50 AM
No but I have another one due in a fortnight. We're popping into Beverley to get a few bits then I'm going to do a bit of studying while the little people are at school.
I'm ok, a bit flat but better than yesterday.
Jaquaia
03-11-20, 08:59 AM
No, that was less than 2 weeks ago. Though with the PCOS, it's possible I suppose.
Strugglingmum
03-11-20, 10:06 AM
(panda) sorry you're feeling a bit flat Jaq. Sending all the best wishes in the world. Do you think all the stuff with A has worn you down a bit. Its certainly been a tough emotionally on you. Also, having the kids off for half term is really tiring and draining physically and mentally, especially when you also have deadlines in the back of your head.
If you can, could you schedule a day off completely soon just to read for fun or do something just for you?
Jaquaia
03-11-20, 10:40 AM
Arthritis flare up?
Possible. My wrists have been a bit achy and my inflammation levels were up a bit last month.
(panda) sorry you're feeling a bit flat Jaq. Sending all the best wishes in the world. Do you think all the stuff with A has worn you down a bit. Its certainly been a tough emotionally on you. Also, having the kids off for half term is really tiring and draining physically and mentally, especially when you also have deadlines in the back of your head.
If you can, could you schedule a day off completely soon just to read for fun or do something just for you?
It's possible. It is a worry that she'll do it again though she has been good.
We've bought the Christmas gift chocolates, picked up J's magazine, and he's taken me for cake!
Strugglingmum
03-11-20, 10:45 AM
Well cake is the cure for many ailments (nod)....... not diabetes of course, except diabetes(giggle)
Stella180
03-11-20, 10:50 AM
Haha, even diabetics need cake once in a while.
Jaquaia
03-11-20, 02:26 PM
Well getting Christmas cake ingredients when we go shopping tomorrow and will be making a small one for both sets of parents once my essay is done. Which is going swimmingly by the way. So far I've been into Beverley, had lunch and done 2 lots of washing!
Well done on the essay love, you're amazing!
Jaquaia
03-11-20, 02:45 PM
Nah. Just starting to type the bit up I've done though, so that's progress
Stella180
03-11-20, 03:34 PM
Is the essay about lunch and shopping in Bev? Or how the load a washing machine?
Jaquaia
03-11-20, 04:46 PM
Unfortunately not! It's on the value of discursive methods in autobiographical talk...
Stella180
03-11-20, 04:48 PM
So your procrastination skills are shining today then lol
Sounds really exciting... not!
Strugglingmum
03-11-20, 05:50 PM
Unfortunately not! It's on the value of discursive methods in autobiographical talk...
See I onew you were genius. Even the title makes my head hurt!!
Jaquaia
03-11-20, 07:42 PM
I wouldn't go that far!!!
Stella180
03-11-20, 08:05 PM
Not quite genius level but highly intelligent for sure.
Jaquaia
03-11-20, 08:48 PM
I just hide it well sometimes!
Stella180
03-11-20, 09:22 PM
We all have blonde moments lol
Jaquaia
04-11-20, 09:57 PM
Thanks to Paula, I remembered I had some vouchers to use for snag tights to ordered 4 pairs. I've been really adventurous! Black, black, black and navy!
Lol, I put in an order for Hazel and Fern. Black, purple and raspberry for Hazel and fishnets, sharkies and rainbow dreams fishnets for Fern lol
How are you love? How's J? The kids? Toby?
The mustard ones are gorgeous, and I’ve just ordered some of their Christmas pairs - with sparkle down the back of the leg :)
Hazel wanted the stars so I might order her those in the next week or so just to make her smile.
Jaquaia
05-11-20, 10:19 AM
I love the suffragette purple but don't have the guts to wear them!
I'm ok, just tired. J is tired and hurting. The garage have fixed the drivers seat in his car to get it through its MOT and it's caused him pain to drive as he now can't adjust it. He's emailed his parents stuff to read on how to support his MH weeks ago and they've either not bothered or completely disregarded it as it's still seems to be all about T.
T doesn't help himself as his attitude stinks at times. He can bully A and talks to J like (swear)(swear)(swear)(swear) at times so I'm perfecting the evil stepmother routine as I won't tolerate it. He tells you what he thinks you want to hear rather than addresses the issue. His eating is an issue too. He's very overweight. There are issues with stealing food. He wolfs his food down and can look very greedy as immediately asks for snacks or pudding or he's asking A for her food when he thinks we aren't listening. We've had to tell the grandparents to stop buying snacks and sweets for them. I've said if they want to buy them treats then fruit is acceptable. I've cut down on portions when doing a roast dinner and make the children have veg. I also make them try new veg. If they like it, brilliant! If they don't, they don't have to eat it again. Our trips out have tended to involve a lot of walking and now we're back in lockdown it will be back to walks along the old railway line or around the village. But he's only with us 50% of the time and they've both told us they never go anywhere when at their mums. He has a noticeable tummy and with how he behaves and that, we're worried he's going to get bullied at secondary.
A is a pain in the butt at times but her behaviour and bedtimes have improved massively since I've lived here. She can still kick off with the best of them but she knows there are consequences to her behaviour. She loves making things with me so the plan is to start making things for Christmas to go in the window... snowflakes and baubles
Stella180
05-11-20, 11:14 AM
T sounds exactly like my lad. He’s doing the exact same think and apparently it’s all my fault :(
I think it's partly how things are with boys, they don't talk about how they are feeling so it comes out in different behaviours. I think you're doing brilliantly through giving them consequences etc Thing is, you may be giving them boundaries, but kids need boundaries. They also know that you're also there for all the lovely stuff too. You're fantastic for them.
What's up with J's seat?
Jaquaia
05-11-20, 03:44 PM
A broke it by kicking it and it's now been fixed into position (I think) so J can't adjust it to how he needs it so driving it has made his shoulder hurt and started his back off. After paying off Toby's triple figure vet bill, needing to replace the drivers seat is the last thing he needs!
I try. A loved making the stuff for the Halloween display and was a bit upset that we couldn't start making things 15 minutes before their mother picked them up so I think I'll teach her how to make paper snowflakes on Sunday
Oh yes paper snowflakes are a must! H + F and I make them each year to decorate the windows ;)
It's a pita about the seat - shame you aren't closer to me or I'd get Marc to fix it for you....
Jaquaia
05-11-20, 04:24 PM
I've bought some glitter glue too so thinking of making paper baubles with her and paper chains nearer Christmas
Stella180
05-11-20, 04:34 PM
Try getting some clear baubles pour various coloured paint in then swing them around.
Jaquaia
05-11-20, 04:59 PM
We have an A and a T! T struggled to use a bottle of glue properly because he doesn't listen, and a would end up getting paint everywhere! And I mean everywhere. She gets toothpaste on me when she's brushing her own teeth! Even if I'm sat behind her to supervise!!!
Lol, are you friends on FB with the lovely Wendy who used to mod here? She's in a group and they've got some amazingly cool ideas for littler people... Shall I see if I can send you an invite?
Jaquaia
05-11-20, 06:28 PM
I don't think I was around when she was here.
That's cool, do you want me to send you an invite?
Jaquaia
05-11-20, 07:09 PM
Yes please! I'll have a look.
Toby is currently hiding under the table at my feet :(
Have invited you ;)
2 out of my 3 are on medication and still freaking out, Crash doesn't care, but Fern is struggling too..... I hate it. They've been going off since last week and I know they now won't stop till January...
Jaquaia
05-11-20, 08:29 PM
Luckily, it's a small village so there haven't been that many but he's still not been happy about it.
Stella180
05-11-20, 09:13 PM
I’m lucky cos Talia has been asleep through most of it tonight. One went off that woke her up and made me jump out of my skin too. A bit of fuss and talking to her calmly and I got her to settle down again and she was snoring again in no time.
It's been horrible here... I've had Fern shaking and in tears with it too... :(
Strugglingmum
05-11-20, 10:23 PM
Poor Fern. We dont celebrate Guy Fawkes here but Halloween had some fireworks. Thankfully we dont get many where we are as my poor dog is petrified..... but then she is petrified of a lot of things.
Awwww....I hate fireworks. Animals and some kids hate them. It's all a bit unnecessary.
Morning love, how are you today? How's the essay going?
Jaquaia
06-11-20, 09:32 AM
Not great, I need to really work at it today
Why are you struggling with this one? Do you know?
Jaquaia
06-11-20, 10:23 AM
Everyone seems to have struggled with this one! It's a pain in the arse
It's got to be easier knowing it's not just you finding it hard?
Jaquaia
06-11-20, 11:09 AM
It is. Hoping I can get it mostly done today as I'm 2 weeks behind in my other module now. Still, because of how this module is layed out, I'm ahead on my reading!
OldMike
06-11-20, 11:27 AM
I'm sure you'll ace it Jaq :) things weren't modular in my day but today it is all flat pack furniture and modules (giggle)
Strugglingmum
06-11-20, 02:17 PM
Hope you get through it and can soon hit Send!! And be rid of it.
Jaquaia
06-11-20, 04:11 PM
Halfway, pretty much exactly! Have most of a conclusion, most of an intro and some limitations so think I'm going to put my laptop of charge soon and handwrite the benefits of using this method and type it up tomorrow!
Stella180
06-11-20, 04:27 PM
Well done.
Jaquaia
06-11-20, 05:10 PM
Only issue is we now have a power cut. Been out 20 minutes so far and isn't expected back on until 8pm. I've emailed my tutor and let him know and asked for an extra day just in case.
That sounds sensible. Bugger for the power cut though...
Jaquaia
06-11-20, 06:58 PM
It's back on but we have far more power cuts than we should. It's under long term investigation but they can't figure out what the issue is
Stella180
06-11-20, 07:06 PM
The power supply, that’s what the issue is. Sorry, did I oversimplify the matter?
Jaquaia
06-11-20, 07:07 PM
(rofl)
Jaquaia
07-11-20, 12:11 PM
Just short of a 1000 words. If I have something to submit I'll be happy, even if it is a load of tripe!
It won't be a load of tripe! Yo can do it!
Jaquaia
07-11-20, 03:15 PM
It's gone!!!
Stella180
07-11-20, 03:54 PM
Time to treat yourself now then.
Strugglingmum
07-11-20, 04:02 PM
It's gone!!!
Hurrah!! Well done you. X
Jaquaia
08-11-20, 12:38 PM
I did homemade scotch pancakes for breakfast. Unfortunately they all liked them so I have to make them again! We're watching Frozen Planet for A's homework, T is actually sat reading! We bought him the new Diary of a Wimpy Kid book for getting a good report and he's devoured it! I'm glad they're settled as I have a headache!
Strugglingmum
08-11-20, 12:57 PM
Hope your head eases. X
Stella180
08-11-20, 01:01 PM
I like the sound of pancakes. Yummy.
Sounds like a lovely day so far! Hope your headache lifts...
Jaquaia
08-11-20, 07:16 PM
Not a chance. They've both been awful today. My head is now banging.
Oh :( What's been the problem?
Jaquaia
08-11-20, 07:47 PM
T has major attitude today, they can't play nicely together and it descends into screaming and shouting and just being thoroughly obnoxious. Sly digs and hitting each other. Crap table manners from T. And I ended up burning my hand after they started screaming and shouting while I was taking stuff out of the oven. I ended up storming through and raising my voice, which I very rarely do, and made them put all the toys away.
Hunni, what were you like with your siblings at that age?
Jaquaia
08-11-20, 09:07 PM
Nowhere near as bad. My mum very rarely had to raise her voice but we could be trusted to be left in a room together. They can't.
Ok, I have to say fights with my brother often ended up in a brawl. Even now, if we disagree the family tends to duck for cover ;) ...... still, your two haven’t had structure and discipline in their lives to date and have grown up thinking that the only way to resolve conflict is through shouting and fighting. They learn from the adults around them. I’m not saying you shouldn’t raise your voice and tell them to put their toys away - that’s exactly the sort of discipline they need - just that you can’t take it personally. Siblings will fight but gradually T & A will learn where the boundaries are. It’s still early days...
Jaquaia
08-11-20, 09:38 PM
I haven't taken it personally, I simply explained what the issue was
Really? Because I’ll admit I took it very personally, a lot, when mine were fighting ...... it’s human nature
Mine are teens and still when B and F get into a row (almost constantly when they are together as they rub each other up the wrong way - both Aspies who see things very differently) it can feel like a war zone.... I have to admit I have been known to lose my sh*t on more than 1 occasion... But Paula's right, you're not dealing with kids who have been shown other ways of conflict resolution apart from shouting and physicality..
You are doing amazingly and they definitely need boundaries. I think you are exactly what they both need. Where was J?
Jaquaia
09-11-20, 09:30 AM
Honestly? No I didn't take it personally. Because T had a chip on his shoulder from the moment he got up yesterday and a lot of it was due to him winding A up. But equally, she must learn that she can't react by hitting people and screaming at them, hence them both having to put everything away. J was trying to talk to them both but every time T said that A had done something she would start screaming that he was a liar and I'd had enough so I jumped in.
In other news, I may have figured out why my yorkshire puddings haven't been rising! It turns out that the power supply to the village is under voltage so instead of the 230v we should be getting, we've been getting 215v so things haven't been working as well as they should.
Stella180
09-11-20, 10:00 AM
See I told you, the problem is your power supply lol
Jaquaia
09-11-20, 11:03 AM
(rofl) very true!
Glad you've worked out the voltage problem!
Jaquaia
09-11-20, 12:12 PM
It wasn't me! Someone posted on the village fb group and an electrician who lives around the corner tested his and got in touch with Northern Powergrid
Hope it means a discount or something!
OldMike
09-11-20, 03:07 PM
The UK power supply used to be 240v +/-6% but to comply with most international standards was dropped to 230v +10%/-6% so taking the -6% tolerance the lowest voltage you should have is 230 - 13.8 = 216.2 volts so at 215 you are only a midges below the minimum voltage, I knew my electrical background would come in useful sometime ;)
Jaquaia
15-11-20, 08:31 PM
Emailed my tutor for an extension a week ago. Deadline is in 2 days so starting to panic, pushing myself to get a fair bit done even though fatigue is an issue at the moment and sent another email today...
"I can give you an extension and I'm sure you're aware that tutors work part time and don't check emails daily"
You were on the fecking forum on the 14th replying to student queries so you were obviously doing OU work!!! I emailed you days before that!!!!! Ffs!!!!
What a (swear)(swear)(swear)(swear)wit!
Strugglingmum
15-11-20, 09:27 PM
In other words she messed up by forgetting or ignoring your email but wants you to feel bad about it.
OO ouch! I'd have to send back a bitterly sweet one..... Those are my forte ;)
Jaquaia
15-11-20, 10:27 PM
She replied to my first email and then replied to my second one saying that! I closed my email quickly before I told her to (swear)(swear)(swear)(swear) off!!!
How are you today love? How's your stiffness/pain? What's on the agenda today?
Jaquaia
16-11-20, 10:34 AM
Tired! Stiffness is at its usual level and have very little pain when I keep my joints warm! Studying is great as the dining table is against the radiator! (giggle)
Going to stick a wash on, don't have to do much until it's dry so it's not taxing. Going to do some studying and a bit more wrapping. Got my s-i-l wrapped last night
Oh and my arm where I had my flu jab still hurts and is now itchy!
Stella180
16-11-20, 10:43 AM
This year I was lucky, not felt a thing where my flu jab is concerned.
Did your s-i-l mind being wrapped? (rofl) (rofl) (rofl)
Jaquaia
16-11-20, 10:55 AM
Smartarse!!! (giggle)
Jaquaia
16-11-20, 02:07 PM
A's presents are all wrapped! Can't lift the box back onto the wardrobe though!!!
Oh wow! Does that mean that
a) you are totally organised
b) you are overly smug
c) f*k, you might actually have to ask for help!
(rofl)
Jaquaia
16-11-20, 02:52 PM
a) yes!
b) no!! Very rarely smug! And anyway, still have my brother, b-i-l, and both sets of parents to finish!
c) no! I reorganised the boxes! (rofl)
Tired! Stiffness is at its usual level and have very little pain when I keep my joints warm! Studying is great as the dining table is against the radiator! (giggle)
Going to stick a wash on, don't have to do much until it's dry so it's not taxing. Going to do some studying and a bit more wrapping. Got my s-i-l wrapped last night
Oh and my arm where I had my flu jab still hurts and is now itchy!Hey, I had the same with my flu jab! A large lump the day after jab which lasted 3-4 days, then it just went red and hurt, then it was itchy for a couple of days...Ian came out of completely unscathed! I've sent all crizzy presents to Scotland!
Reorganising boxes is cheating...
Stella180
16-11-20, 06:40 PM
Not cheating at all, have you never played Tetris?
Jaquaia
16-11-20, 07:11 PM
(giggle)
A has a much bigger pile than T but only one of her presents was above £10 and her main gift was £40 and T's was double that so if he moans, he'll be getting put in his place, birthday or no birthday!!! J would normally get them nice things he thinks they'd like but I've insisted they have the same spent on them. Our differences in upbringing are obvious sometimes! I think A's stuff is 90% unicorn related and it's all in unicorn wrapping paper! Can you see a theme?
Not worried about my first family Christmas, not one bit!(angel)
Stella180
16-11-20, 07:18 PM
I usually have a budget but I don’t stick to spending the same amount on both. Age difference affects the cost of gifts. I do try to ensure they have the same number of gifts to open and I’ve become the master of stocking fillers over the years, plus my youngest has a birthday in December so if he gets something big for his B’day he doesn’t get so much for Christmas and vice versa. I try to mix it up each year but can’t afford to do it all.
Jaquaia
16-11-20, 07:37 PM
T's lego was nearly double the price of A's and his things were more expensive so not that fussed that A has more. We just need to sort his birthday out now. He has a few tshirts but nothing else. We have Eleanors birthday presents sorted though!
Hazel's birthday is Christmas Eve and the deal is that never shall her Birthday be merged with Christmas and birthday stuff is wrapped in birthday paper and Christmas stuff in Christmas paper lol
We tend to try to spend around the same on each of them..
Jaquaia
16-11-20, 07:46 PM
T's is Christmas Day and his presents will be wrapped separately too. Can't help merging his birthday with Christmas which is apparently why they give him a half birthday!
Stella180
16-11-20, 07:51 PM
Whenever I see the name Eleanor I automatically think of the 1967 Mustang GT500 from Gone in 60 seconds.
That's a lovely idea! - Actually I'm sure you've mentioned that before....
Jaquaia
16-11-20, 09:35 PM
I probably have! He's already been told he won't get as much as A as his birthday is spread over 2 days whereas she gets one day
How are you today? What's on your agenda?
Jaquaia
17-11-20, 11:54 AM
I'm ok, just tired so plodding! Had my writer's group last night. That was fun as the organiser couldn't get teams to work so we ended up starting half an hour late on a fb video call!!! It was fun though. I've changed the kids beds and washed the bedding and sat and finished my book so far. Thinking of doing some more wrapping and a bit of uni work, then I have a tutorial tonight.
I'm so glad you're enjoying your writers group!
Could changing the kids beds not have waited a little?
Jaquaia
17-11-20, 01:54 PM
No as they're back on Thursday and ours needs changing too so I wanted to spread it out.
But could it wait until J could help?
Jaquaia
17-11-20, 05:57 PM
I'm ok with single beds. And the rheumy OT taught me how to change a quilt cover with minimal impact on my hands
Whenever I see the name Eleanor I automatically think of the 1967 Mustang GT500 from Gone in 60 seconds. OMG I love Mustang's! I was in Canada visiting my Aunt in 1968 and my cousins boyfriend had a yellow convertible Mustang (I was only 15) and we flew down the freeway and on the radio McArthur Park was playing (Richard Harris) I remember it as if it was yesterday *Sighhh* those were the days!
Jaquaia
17-11-20, 06:23 PM
OO share that secret...
This makes it so much easier!
https://youtu.be/DRPfudNNd8Y
Stella180
17-11-20, 06:51 PM
OMG! I love you Jaq! That is potentially life changing for me. Thanks for sharing, but what took you so long?
That’s awesome - Si will love that. But..... why did they have a duvet cover that they needed to cover a COMFORTER? They know the word duvet, so use it! ;)
Jaquaia
17-11-20, 07:01 PM
OMG! I love you Jaq! That is potentially life changing for me. Thanks for sharing, but what took you so long?
To be honest, I rarely use that method as the opening in my duvet cover is ridiculously small!!! I need to test it out really, it works on my mums.
That’s awesome - Si will love that. But..... why did they have a duvet cover that they needed to cover a COMFORTER? They know the word duvet, so use it! ;)
(giggle)
Stella180
17-11-20, 07:06 PM
Bloody yanks for ya Paula, lol. They like to crucify the English language. Watching the start of that video that could easily have been me. Changing the duvet cover is enough to make me want to get back into bed and hide.
OMG that is life changing! I've got to do our bed, so will give it a go!
magie06
17-11-20, 08:59 PM
I was to do my bed today, but I just couldn't face it. I'm going to try this out tomorrow.
Bloody yanks for ya Paula, lol. They like to crucify the English language. Watching the start of that video that could easily have been me.
I sent the link to Si, who said exactly the same as I did!
Jaquaia
17-11-20, 09:48 PM
If I knew it was this easy to get you lot excited I would have shown you all this ages ago! (rofl)
Chufty moment. Had a tutorial and there were only 2 of us and the tutor. He asked a question, I answered it and he said my answer was better than his suggestion!
magie06
17-11-20, 09:53 PM
Brainiac!!
Stella180
17-11-20, 10:00 PM
You go girl. Super nerd lol
Isn’t that your second Chufty moment recently? :)
Strugglingmum
17-11-20, 10:55 PM
Go you. X
Well done love!
How are you today? What's on your agenda?
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 08:54 AM
Getting up and showering will be a good start!
Going to change our bedding, do a quick hoover, sort some forms out for my mum, do some uni work and a bit more wrapping! I know it sounds like loads but I'm going to spread it out over the course of the day
Make sure you do spread it out.... Or else...
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 09:04 AM
I'll be honest, my main focus has to be drinking more today. I still hadn't finished my first drink at half 5 last night then had several and was up at half 5 desperate for the loo!
Was that the only drink you had yesterday?
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 09:40 AM
No, I had about 3 or 4 after that.
Stella180
18-11-20, 09:41 AM
OMG! You are prioritising drinking!? It's a good job I was sitting down when I read that
No, I had about 3 or 4 after that.
But only 1 during the whole day?
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 10:16 AM
I know, not good. Which is why I'm not going up to make the bed until I've finished my drink
How are you doing on the drinking front?
I know, not good. Which is why I'm not going up to make the bed until I've finished my drink
Good. Is it finished?
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 12:56 PM
It is and halfway through my second. Just done my mums forms with her. She had the PHQ-7 and GAD-9 to fill out and really didn't like having to tell me that she often thought of hurting herself as the pain gets that bad. I'm angry that she had to tell me that because they hadn't listened to her saying she struggled with technology! She shouldn't have been put in that position when they could have easily mailed the forms out. Her telling me that should have been a case of choosing to tell me not having to tell me.
Oh hunni, that's tough for her, but it's really tough for you to hear too. Are you OK?
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 03:04 PM
I'm ok. She kept apologising and I kept telling her there was no need to. She's in chronic pain all the time, I'd be surprised if her mental health hadn't suffered.
Might have been wrong but I did ask her if she felt like a bit of a dick for telling me to pull myself together when I was first put on ADs and she apologised.
(panda) for you and your mum
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 03:19 PM
Thanks Paula.
I also made sure she didn't downplay anything.
Stella180
18-11-20, 03:41 PM
I spoke to your mum earlier. She is very good at side stepping issues and down playing how things are for her. I’m guessing you reassured her that she has nothing to be ashamed of? I think it’s awful that she is suffering so badly with the pain. I hope they get her sorted out quickly.
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 03:44 PM
Yep. Told her that I'd circled that one more times than I could remember so I'm never going to judge her.
Well does that mean she has a better idea of what you have been going through?
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 04:56 PM
She does now!
Aw I hate that you have both circled that one. You shouldn't be in so much pain that you want to hurt yourself or worse....
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 05:50 PM
I said ages ago that they should have suggested a pain psychologist
Your poor mum..and anyone else that suffers pain on a daily basis! There is nothing more debilitating than pain, it seems to sap every bit of energy you have to combat it. No one in this day and age should have to 'put up' with pain, it's inexcusable!!
Everyone who struggles with chronic pain should have a pain psychologist imho
Has she ever been referred to the pain clinic?
Jaquaia
18-11-20, 10:23 PM
Yes and they pretty much washed their hands of her and said lose weight. She's been on long terms steroids since she was diagnosed with RA 3 years ago, and before that off and on for recurrent chest infections.
Stella180
18-11-20, 10:54 PM
They know she’s on meds that cause weight gain and she is inactive due to pain so why haven’t they offered her support and guidance on how to lose weight, like referral to a dietitian for example? It boils my blood how they leave people to cope on their own
That's awful. Steroids cause so many side effects too....
Morning love, how are you doing? What do you have planned for the day?
Jaquaia
19-11-20, 09:25 AM
I was in that appointment so pointed out she was inactive due to pain and was on meds that caused weight gain so needed more help than "lose weight" and suggested a referral to Weightwise. They helped me enormously and I know there was someone at my assessment who had limited mobility and they were able to help her too as they taylor things to your abilities and circumstances.
Shopping and uni work for me today!
How long ago was that? Is it worth asking for a new referral?
Jaquaia
19-11-20, 10:30 AM
It was just before lockdown. She has heard back from them, I just can't remember when
Does she keep all her letters?
I agree with Paula, any chance of a new referral?
How's the shopping go? Doing it alone? How's the uni work going?
Jaquaia
19-11-20, 03:11 PM
She can check I suppose. I haven't done any uni work in a few days. I need to as I have a deadline on Tuesday. I have got a fair bit of wrapping done though! J always comes shopping with me. I think I'm struggling a little at the moment as I got very stressed and snappy. I struggle to recognise it as struggling as it's nowhere near as bad as before.
Why haven't you done uni work? Could it be that you're so busy doing all the housework etc?
When are you actually going to rest?
Jaquaia
19-11-20, 05:17 PM
Struggling to concentrate. Going to work little and often I think!
Good plan. I use the pomodoro technique when I am that way. Helps me a lot.
Good plan... Mira what's the pomodoro technique?
Jaquaia
19-11-20, 09:07 PM
J's counsellor has told him he needs to look after himself and sometimes do stuff that he would consider selfish...
Smug? Me??? Nah!!! (angel)
Stella180
19-11-20, 09:12 PM
I have a really smutty answer to that which isn’t suitable for the open forum
Jaquaia
19-11-20, 09:15 PM
(rofl)(rofl)(rofl)
(rofl) I hope that means he's going to do something fun....
Jaquaia
19-11-20, 09:26 PM
Probably more modelling and reading knowing him.
Stella180
19-11-20, 09:54 PM
I was just imagining J posing for a CK billboard ad and then realised you meant trains
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