Anxiety & Depression Hell..*TRIGGERS*

[SA89]

My head is so convoluted that I don't enjoy anythin. I've applied for stuff here & there.. I went to my doc yesterday & apparently I cant get a diagnosis because I'm not like mental or anythin. He said my depression is a result of my social withdrawal ever since I was a kid. And he said uppin my 20mg will just mke me more tired .

I've tried other meds & thyre the same. I can't take this unbearable lonely feeling anymore. Without meaningful relationships theres no reason for me to be here. Constant misery with no end in sight.. I've even tried dating sites with not 1 response frm like 20 messages ha . Desire.. Despair.. Desire.. Despair..

[Suzi]

Has the doctor referred you for therapy or given you some idea of what you can do to help? I'm really not sure that him saying that was particularly helpful...

[Amaya]

The Mind website lists loneliness amoungst the other common mental health issues. Not sure how that relates to diagnosis exactly.

[SA89]

Has the doctor referred you for therapy or given you some idea of what you can do to help? I'm really not sure that him saying that was particularly helpful...

I started therapy last week with an asian woman so i've got 6-12 sessions with her. I think with social withdrawal the only thing any1 can tell u really is to 'get out more' etc, thts y I think the doc was so vague. That advice will follow me to my grave! . I do go places like town for example but its always been just me & my shadow. I'm still takin the fluxotine despite little relief but wt choice do I have?. Without thm I'm even more emotional. I can barely crack a genuine laugh anymore (except wen I'm banterin with my cousin).

[Suzi]

Glad you've started therapy... What about joining a group with similar interests?

[SA89]

I just don't fit in anywhere, I've had 4 interviews recently & failed every single 1 of them. Came across well just don't have customer service experience basically. I'm so desperate for a relationship that its clouding my every move. Even if a girl has a moody personality she'll still attract men wereas a man wouldn't be given a second look & be considered 'weak' .

When we're not meeting this need its immensely frustrating & painful. Seein other lads at work flirting with objects of my desire makes me deeply despairing within an instant. Just to experience love for the 1st time would be liberating (even if thy wr to dump me shortly after!). Apologies if this comes across as self-loathing but I just needed to vent this immense frustration to a public audience .

[Noel]

Hello , if it is any help , i was exactly like this through my teenage years , I couldn't think of any good points about myself . I was short , and so self conscious about everything , from my looks to my personality which ironically was ok until i became so self conscious . I hit an all time low when i was 18 , painfully shy with a real need to be liked by others . What i did was start going to my local gym every other night and started weight training and going on the treadmill , and they had a punch bag also . (i think at the time i thought i was rocky ) . The gym isn't everyones cup of tea but without realizing after a few months of this routine of "me" time and to hell with what others were doing or saying i for the first time in years started to get my self confidence and even though i felt like i was no oil painting i felt great about myself . I am 41 now and i do get bouts of depression which is clinical , but that time i started to go to the gym really gave me the confidence to come out of my shell . The gym isn't for everyone but it worked for me . I am sure the right person is out there for you , places like gyms or running clubs will also get you socializing .

[Paula]

You haven't failed those interviews, they'll have just gone with someone with more relevant experience. Are you working at the moment? If not, have you considered doing temp work to gain experience?

Experiencing love if you get dumped shortly after, seems to me to be a statement that you're not looking for love, but sex. And if a girl is looking for a relationship, they will see through that, and more often than not, be put off. Try looking for a girl you'd like to spend time with rather than an 'object of your desire'. (Btw, women aren't objects)

[Suzi]

As Paula has said - is it love or sex you are wanting?

[SA89]

I want both tbh but more a soul-mate who I can go shoppin with & frolic in the sun. That ain't happenin anytime soon though because I'm a serious recluse. I work atm yeah on weekends at Burger King. I just feel constantly withdrawn from every1 else there because they're all socialites. Bein 5'3 doesn't help but thats no excuse tbh . Paula a few of those interviews I had wr for temp work. My brothers a pain as well, hes just not a very nice person, smokin weed in the house all the time, tellin mum to f off etc. My life is so miserable, I feel trapped inside my circling thoughts. I'm that motionless I may as well be a vegetable .