Last couple months has been too much for me to cope with..
My brother had heart attack, had stent put in, now more tests as he’s still got breathing and circularly problems. He’s 2 yrs younger than me.
Had to have my beagle put to sleep due to cancer.
A friend passed away same day as beagle put to sleep. Friend also 2 yrs younger than me. Attended church service - it was a beautiful service. She was in a horse pulled hearse.
To top all the above - my lungs has something on/in them and cancer cannot be ruled out. X-ray and ct scan not very clear so went for endoscopy (done down the throat. After having blood pressure, temp taken I was in a waiting room.
I just couldn’t go through with the endoscopy, yes I was explained about what was going to happen. People who’s had the procedure have told me how it went for them, I know they mean well but it doesn’t help.
Made the decision that I shall NOT have any invasive procedures or treatments.
I did want to know what it is I’ve got, however, now decided I don’t want to know.
Got an appointment in a weeks time to see consultant, see what they say, I’ve decided that I won’t be going back for any appointments - rather spend that time on my bike. Every appointment so far has peeved me off - I’d rather be cycling as life is far too short. But I’ve gone back to watching tv every day and evening.
Going round singing ‘Everybody's gotta go sometime.’
Please don’t try to change my mind - it’s made up and besides, I’d NEVER take treatment for cancer…