Worried about dosage incr *SU/AB Trigger*

[Suzi]

I think a lot of us hate uncertainty... How is your mood atm? Are you taking the meds?

[rami]

Yes I know but some people can embrace it. My mood is okay but it's not great. My confidence has taken a dip. And yes I am still taking my medications, thank you for asking.

I remember the days when I used to love myself and had so much confidence. Now I barely have any of that left

[Suzi]

Hunni, are you trying to look too far in the future? Could you try focussing on day by day?

[rami]

I know I'm looking too far into the future but when it comes down to it, I try to take things day by day. I dont think it's wrong to worry about the future but it certainly doesnt help. The way I think is that if I know what the future holds, I can either keeping going today or give up everything. Most people keep moving forward cause they have hope. I have very little of that at the moment. It's hard to trust that things will be fine

[Paula]

I know right now it doesn’t seem it, but there will be a way through, things will be fine. But none of us knows what the future holds and trying to predict it will always end up in problems, especially at the moment.

[Suzi]

Thing is, the future isn't something that anyone can see or be totally sure of. However, fighting the best you can each day is the best thing you can do...

[rami]

Yeah and youre right! But it's hard to not be carried away by my fear of the future. Especially when I dont have much hope to hold onto

[Paula]

There’s always hope. Just a little bit about me - over 7 years ago I had a fall which led to life changing injuries. Until last summer, I was getting worse and worse and more disabled year on year and I didn’t believe there was hope of any improvement. In August last year, I went on a residential pain management programme that literally changed my life. I am still disabled but am managing a thousand times better, and have been able to get my life back. If you’d have told me a year ago that this would happen, I would not have believed you, no one would.

There is always hope

[rami]

Thanks for sharing that with me, I'm so glad that you are able to manage your disability better now I wasn't always like this, before this year, I had hope and I have been through a tonne of difficult situations. 9 years of bullying, issues with my dad, strict parents, rejection from guys, sexual assault, falling out with a best friend of 10 years, skin condition (lifelong), was first love who ended up getting depression, being made redundant from first job out of uni etc. these are the most painful things I have been through but there was one thing that always stuck with me and that was hope. I was able to hold onto hope even after my heart was broken from my first love and yet, I'm sat here with nothing but hesitation for the future. The depression has really screwed me up. Somedays I feel like I will stuck in this voide forever.

[Paula]

Oh hunni, I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with all that

I’ve added an additional trigger warning to your thread, just to make sure anyone who want to avoid those discussions