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Thread: Chapter 2: the book addict rejoins the world

  1. #1441
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    They're on iplayer at the moment
    Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro

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    Suzi (29-02-20)

  3. #1442
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    Back home. Wish I wasn't but I need time to sort my stuff out. Cruella has been her usual self. After the go she had about me just mentioning the children on fb, she's added a photo of all their feet in a circle, after specifically saying no photos of the children and new partners, and labelled it my family so J challenged her. Cue loads of abuse and how she didn't want to read all my posts so I blocked her.... nor even an hour later she was giving him more abuse about me having blocked her. Like J said, she complains when she can see what I put and she complains when she can't see. She had no comeback to that. But according to one of J's friends, his ex is not my issue to deal with, it's J's. Pretty much amounted to I can support him but it's none of my business.
    Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro

  4. #1443
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    I don't think it's a case of not being your business as such, but I do think that it's more to do with him standing up to her and making sure that what he says happens. I'm glad you've blocked her and I think that's the most sensible thing to do. I'd also suggest that he puts posts so she can't see them - not unfriend him as he needs to see what she posts, but just so she can't see posts which she might have an issue with...
    I assume it's all being documented? It's also worth documenting every time you take the kids to school, you look after them etc etc etc.... I'd also document every scratch, bruise etc that you notice - esp those done while you and J or his parents are looking after them....
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  5. #1444
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    We will.

    When his parents dropped them off on Saturday, T came and sat on the kitchen counter while I cooked their tea and we had a long chat. I made it very clear to him that if things ever got too much for him there, he never has to worry about me wanting them there, that it will always be his home and if he wanted to live there all the time he never has to worry about me saying no. Maybe not what I should have done but it felt right to offer him that reassurance. He's not happy about her calling her bf and his daughter their family, he's not happy about her mother telling him that all he needs is Cruella and her bf, and he's not happy about her mother talking about Toby dying or not needing Toby (J's twatcat). In fact, they only got dropped off with Cruella a little after 5 and he's already rang J in tears begging him to go pick him up as the minute he walked in the house she started screaming at him for forgetting to do some jobs before he left on saturday... He's talked to us about some of his memories this weekend and they nearly all involve her shouting at J. He used to go up to his room to play but it turns out what he really did was lay on his bedroom floor with his ear to the floor listening to her shout and scream at J as he was scared about what she'd do. And the bit that upset me the most was when I told him that his feelings were just as important as the adults feelings, he said he didn't feel important and he doesn't feel like he is to his mum or her mum. I gave him the hugest hug.

    He nearly made me cry yesterday though. We went for a 2 mile walk in the country (will post some pics of the area around my new home later), we got home, helped him with homework, did tea and then settled down to watch the Titfield Thunderbolt with popcorn before bed. J went in to say goodnight after A's stories had been sorted and I heard him say...

    "goodnight daddy. I love you. You're the best. Tell Kerry she's the best too"

    *sniffs*
    Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro

  6. #1445
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Poor thing.. I don't understand why J isn't taking action against her having the kids when he's hearing things like that. I couldn't bear knowing that my kids were going through it and I was allowing her to treat them like sh*t because I hadn't stood up for them.... If he doesn't stand up for them and demonstrate to them that they deserve better and no one has the right to treat them like she does then they'll never believe it...
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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    Flo (04-03-20)

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