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Thread: New member

  1. #1

    New member

    Hi everybody

    Just registered on here to join the community. Am a 33 year old male living in the UK. Suffer with depression and social anxiety.
    Had depression for a number of years and first became aware of my social anxiety at the age of 19.
    Take venlafaxine for my depression and currently live at home with my mother. Am a mature student at university.
    Have never felt happy or content with my life. Always felt like an outsider. Moved around the country quite a lot and have only one friend I can see sometimes.
    I was in a relationship that lasted about 5 years but ended in 2017 due to me quitting a course I was on that was going to lead to a decent job but I hated it ..and back to square one with no decent paid job.
    I just dont function like a normal person. Always feel low and want to withdraw. Hardly have any interest in anything or feel motivated to try and make friends. Don't use facebook or instagram. Really lost in life and feel hopeless. Only having a great mother is what keeps me going.
    Feel so ashamed of the way I am. Im getting older and just don't know how my life will improve. Always find it difficult being with other people and just want to withdraw.

  2. #2
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Feb 2012
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    Surrey. UK
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    Hi and welcome to DWD! I can assure you that you have nothing to be ashamed about. You are poorly. You wouldn't be ashamed if it was a physical illness.
    What are you studying at uni? How long have you been on the venlafaxine? When did you see your GP last?
    Please always remember that I am always right. I have a framed certificate to prove it.

    When in doubt, stop and think... WWSS? (What Would Suzi Say?)
    For more info please see
    THIS thread


  3. #3
    Hi Suzi, Im studying english literature at university. I've been taking venlafaxine for about 5 years. Came off it in february as I started doing a lot of exercise with a personal trainer
    and was feeling better about myself. At this time I thought I was feeling great but my mother, who i live with noticed my moods were very manic, I wasn't sleeping and attending university and now unfortunately have to repeat the year due to absence. I have been taking meds again for about a month and will be starting university again next month.

  4. #4
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    Sep 2014
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    East Riding of Yorkshire
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    Hi and welcome! I'm a mature student too! Definitely nothing to be ashamed about
    Tn prdu, jhami s rcbro

  5. #5
    Hi Jaquala. Nice to meet you. What do you study at university?

  6. #6
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
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    Your Mum sounds supportive... Have you been back to see your GP? Have you ever had any talking therapy?
    Please always remember that I am always right. I have a framed certificate to prove it.

    When in doubt, stop and think... WWSS? (What Would Suzi Say?)
    For more info please see
    THIS thread


  7. #7
    She is, I'm very lucky. I have been put back onto venlafaxine, was a telephone conversation with my GP. Waiting list to have a face to face appointment is 3 weeks at my clinic.
    Years ago I was referred to therapist and it took months after it was arranged to finally see anybody. I didnt find it very helpful and dont have faith in the benefits of it (nhs)
    Probably be a different situation if it was a private therapist who you went to see on a regular weekly basis but my last experience of getting a therapist through the nhs wouldn't have me attempting to go down that route again.

  8. #8
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tommy_85 View Post
    Hi Jaquala. Nice to meet you. What do you study at university?
    I'm doing psychology with counselling through the OU

    Quote Originally Posted by Tommy_85 View Post
    She is, I'm very lucky. I have been put back onto venlafaxine, was a telephone conversation with my GP. Waiting list to have a face to face appointment is 3 weeks at my clinic.
    Years ago I was referred to therapist and it took months after it was arranged to finally see anybody. I didnt find it very helpful and dont have faith in the benefits of it (nhs)
    Probably be a different situation if it was a private therapist who you went to see on a regular weekly basis but my last experience of getting a therapist through the nhs wouldn't have me attempting to go down that route again.
    I think as in all walks of life, there is good and bad. I've had some truly horrendous counsellors and some absolutely amazing ones.
    Tn prdu, jhami s rcbro

  9. #9
    Yes I'm sure there are wonderful therapists out there. I am not against going to see one but I just don't know whether I will request it at this point. Maybe if things don't improve. I really just want to meet people with similar issues to myself and try and form friendships and a support group.

  10. #10
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    Sep 2014
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    Ultimately, counselling won't work properly if you don't engage with it fully, and if you're currently not comfortable with the idea then you're making the best choice for you.

    Have you contacted your local Mind? They often run support groups. Andy's Man Club is another good resource if there's one in your area. And you will always find people who understand here
    Tn prdu, jhami s rcbro

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