Reason i'm posting this is because as a male, talking about my emotions is socially unacceptable (Which is BS) and so i've never spoken or told anyone about this stuff...
Overall, I'm nothing. I don't like who i am and i don't think anyone else does either. I'm never going to make any impact in anyone's lives as I'm just boring, I'm average and worthless. I've never been someone's best friend or had a best friend and that's what normally hits me the most. I also have chronic lonlieness sp being lonley and cutting connections is normal but I just want to be able to be so close to someone, talk about life, have sleepovers, go to their house, trust them no matter what but it's never happened.
When i was in year 7 (age 11-12) I tried to take my life, being lonley was too much, i'd hide in bathrooms through out lunch and break, cry every time. i tried to hang myself but i got too scared and so i stopped. Since i have social anxiety and autism i have never been to great at making friends and it did get to me ALOT. I'm also anorexic and so i hate myself even more.

If anyone else sees this and can relate. I'm here for you :) You are worth so much