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Thread: Depression, loneliness & excessive worry*SH Trigs*

  1. #41
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    Then you need a better doctor. He can't NOT allow other medications. My GP had never heard of the antidepressant that I've been prescribed, but because a specialist nurse has prescribed it, he continues to do so. I'm on my 9th antidepressant, it's not perfect but it allows me to have a life. Research suggests that if drugs from the same class don't work, a drug from another class might. SNRI's, NaSSA's... even tricyclics or MAOI's. What I take is none of those, it's only been licensed a few years, but there are something like almost 30 different drugs that can be prescribed for depression. Your gp has options and he is failing in his duty of care towards you by refusing to consider them. Maybe it's worth trying to see another gp in the practice?

    But there is also the question of did you take them correctly and did you give them long enough? A common cause of antidepressants not working is people don't take them as advised. Are you using what you learned in talking therapies or forgetting as soon as you've left the appointment, another common reason for counselling not improving things. I'm not saying that's what you did btw, but knowing if you complied will help us to understand better.

    Would you be willing to look at the recovery academy courses? It's called the recovery college here and the mental health services have had some success with it.
    Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro

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  3. #42
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Medication isn’t the answer for everyone but I have to point out that there are over four times as many ADs available as you have tried. If your depression is worse without them, please don’t rule them out completely .....

    Jaq suggested some herbal remedies to you - it might be worth talking to your doctor about them and getting their opinion.
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

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  5. #43
    SA89
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    Really don't feel comfortable at the moment, my evil brother has invited his friends into the kitchen to smoke weed & get drunk. When my mum's out he takes advantage. I've not even made my tea because I'm scared to be around him & his friends. My depression is more of an issue than my anxiety but this really makes me anxious. I keep applying for a council flat but there's like 40 applicants for each listing. I'm really desperate because I feel really intimidated by him especially when he's had a drink which I've touched on before . Even the samaritan I spoke to said that living with someone as volatile as this is bound to have an effect. Imagine living with someone that has a "gang-like mentality" when you have low confidence & mental health issues.

    I won't rule out the meds but there has to be a reason why my GP only prescribes the 4 main SSRI's. He said the others are considered less safe. I took the SSRI's for months at a consistent time. With counselling I learned a lot but struggled to act on it. I'll look into the recovery classes. My home environment is a source of my low self esteem because of the brother I live with. Even the samaritan said it's understandable that I'm insecure living with him. Outside of my house I feel free because I'm not in his presence. No one makes me retreat to my shell quite like he does. If I ever called him out for his behavior I'd be threatened. He gets away with it because he helps my mum with the shopping & around the house which is more than I do tbh. But least I'm respectful. I really wish my area was full of people like you guys not the types that are in my house right now ..
    Last edited by SA89; 25-05-19 at 10:27 PM.

  6. #44
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    SNRIs are just as safe or they wouldn't be able to prescribe them as easily as they do, and in all my time on here and on a similar group on fb, I have never once heard of a GP refusing to prescribe other meds when SSRI's haven't worked. Suzi's husband, for example, takes venlafaxine and has had great success with it and we've had members who have done well on duloxetine, both SNRI's. I think Paula takes venlafaxine too but not 100% sure on that. The only difference, from the reading I've done, (and I've done a lot!) is that SSRI's tend to have fewer side effects. But some people respond better to SSRI's and some respond better to SNRI's (then you get the awkward ones like me who don't respond to either ). Maybe it's a case of one of the ones you've tried that took the edge off would have worked better at a higher dose. Depression is a funny illness really as it affects us all differently.

    The bonus of the recovery college stuff is it will get you out of the house.
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  8. #45
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Your GP only prescribes those because those are the standard ones which they try everyone who needs them on. It's more difficult to get seen by secondary services, but I think you need to say to this Dr that if they won't try something else then maybe you need to be referred to someone else who might be able to help you more.
    Did you take the meds at the same time each day? Not drink alcohol? Stay on them for 4-8 weeks? Not all agree with each person. My husband is on his 6th as the fluoxetine he'd been on for years didn't help when he went back on it... This one is helping him hugely though!

    If you are genuinely fearful for yourself then surely you could get help if you were open and honest about it?
    Why aren't you helping your Mum around the place?
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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  10. #46
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Venlafaxine, amitryptaline, Lithium. I’ve been on this particular combination for 4 years now and I’m still here. I also take other meds for other conditions inc pregabalin which is for pain but also helps my anxiety.

    Without these psych meds I wouldn’t be here - end of. At no point has any medical professional ever informed me of any concerns for the safety of venlafaxine and amitryptaline. Yes, there are side effects but they’re manageable, as long as I look after myself and I take the meds as prescribed.

    I’m sorry, but I just don’t believe your GP believes that non SSRI ADs are less safe. It’s simply not true. It may be, as Suzi says, that those are the standard ones they prescribe and you need a referral to secondary services but that’s not the same as your GP stating that others aren’t safe. If you really do want to get better, you need to go back to your doctor and push for alternative treatment and/or a referral.
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

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  12. #47
    SA89
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    I really need to stop going on Facebook & looking how amazing everyone's life is compared to mine, I don't know why I do this myself! . There's people I've known who were not very pleasant yet have the most amazing social life. They have a family & everything & have a congregate of people to celebrate their new born baby or whatever. That kind of life is completely alien to me. I can't help but envy it because I've always struggled to even leave my room. I'm ashamed of my lack of independence .. Even on the meetups I've been going to, they all have a car, been married etc. I'm 29 & I'm so far behind on social development it's a joke. A mean I can't even tie my own shoelaces ffs! Or even use the washing machine..

    When I tell people this it startles them. And they don't understand why I've never had a relationship considering I'm respectful, not bad looking & can articulate myself well. But that's the price I've paid for being a recluse. Like Jaq touched on I def need to see another counselor because it's a mountain of insecurities that medication won't resolve. I'm never content at all. I just want to know what it feels like to be loved ..
    Last edited by SA89; 26-05-19 at 06:14 PM.

  13. #48
    Mira
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    Facebook can be great. But also its easy to see a false picture. I am alone most of the time. But If I were to add a few pictures now and then it would seem I have the most interesting life ever. There are a lot of lonely people on there that seem to be so social and outgoing.

    If you can not tie your own shoelaces. And do not know how to use a washing machine. Learn. These are skills we will all need one day.

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  15. #49
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    Want me to be honest with you? My fb is full of photos of me smiling, with friends, stuff I've done... other than the odd post about mental health it doesn't show the reality of my life. I'm 35 and only just learning how to drive, and then only because when I move in with my partner, I'll be living in a village with very limited public transport. Up until last year, I never went out on my own if I could avoid it. I live with my parents and have done absolutely nothing with my first degree. My posts and photos don't reveal how I'd worked out a few ways of ending my life, and in such a way that people wouldn't know until it was too late. They don't reveal the scars on my arms from where I've hurt myself. They don't reveal the hatred I have for myself, and they don't reveal the heartache I feel at not being able to have children. It doesn't reveal the assaults or the abuse I've suffered. I have a school friend on there who never revealed her heartache at years of fertility treatment until she got her miracle and shared a slideshow of her journey. If you looked at my partners social media over the last few years, it would look like he had a perfect life and a perfect family. It doesn't reveal that his wife was emotionally abusing him pretty much since they married. It doesn't show that she started getting physical with him or was always screaming and shouting abuse at him in front of their children, to the extent that their 9 year old is scared of her. Social media shows you what people want you to see, it doesn't always show you their reality so try not to judge your life by that

    I am an introvert, always have been, and I find making new friends incredibly hard. I learned to fake it. I would make myself join in conversations, even if I felt awkward and out of place. It got easier over time.

    If you want to be more independent, then what can you change? What skills can you learn to enable that? Youtube videos will probably teach you how to tie laces. And for what it's worth, I've started doing the washing out of necessity as my mum can't physically do it at the moment. I'm older than you and learned, you can too. Starr small and build up when things start feeling more comfortable
    Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro

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  17. #50
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Why don't you learn to tie your laces, do the washing, cook a basic but lovely meal - a roast dinner is easier than you think or a stew which can be made in the morning and cook all day in a slow cooker? The only way that things will change is if you make them change..
    All of my children can do washing, hang it out, they can all cook at least a basic meal - try pasta bake if a roast dinner is too much mentally right now and that's because a) it's my job to teach them to be independent b) there are days I can't physically do things like the washing so need help c) they have to learn to clean up the mess that they make too! If they can all do it so can you.
    You are the one with the control to make changes to aspects you don't like. It's up to you.
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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