Umm, hi all!
Feeling slightly weird posting as I've only just this morning figured that my feelings (or lack of them!) of the last 4 years or so could be perhaps linked with depression, I'm not sure! I've not seen my GP or anything, I'm just scouring the internet trying to link things together in my own head.

So, I'm a mum of 1 & I'm currently 23 weeks pregnant with num 2 which has bought everything to light I think. I am racked with guilt as unlike my 1st pregnancy I feel nothing, no excitement, no joy, nothing. I of course love my eldest child but I feel nothing else & looking back haven't done since not long after he was born 4 years ago. I plod along in my life pretty much emotionless, faking my 'usual happy self' to friends and family but inside not feeling any gratification from anything, I almost wish I felt sad instead of this nothingness.
My husband gets the brunt, I know he's a great guy but I seem completely unable to let him know that, like I'm purposely pushing him to leave me alone, ugh. I'm a closed person as it is so find it difficult to open up which my husband struggles with, but the last few years have made it even worse and our relationship's strained as he feels unloved but I feel unable to show him love for reasons I don't really understand myself so can't explain to him!

Anyways, I'm waffling! Hi! Look forward to perhaps getting to know some of you