Not quite sure where to put this but I am new to this forum and have been struggling with depression for some time now. I tried to express how I feel with these descriptive words.

It holds you tight, this disease. Sometimes, fleetingly, you can pull away and break the surface, to feel the warmth of the sun on your face again, only for it to drag you down into its murky depths once more, repeating over and over in a miserable cycle.

It disconnects you from those you love, disengages you from the things you love, sucks the colour and energy from life. The Joys of the simple things ebb away to the daily drumbeat of drab monotones .

And of course, you should be happy. You have a family, two beautiful precious girls. Every reason to be joyous.

But you are dragging them down into your world so you let them go as you lose yourself. Their voices, their laughter becoming more and more distant as you drift helplessly away. Fading to grey and onward to black.