Mira's adventures **trigger warnings**

[Jarre]

Thanks all for the nice words

Such a great group of people

I was wondering if its an expression that you made Flo. Or if you think i am a woman ��

Floydian slip I think

How are you this morning? Hope you had more sleep than me, stupid tooth kept me awake last night! Any plans today?

[Mira]

The last time I was called a woman was when I worked in a supermarket. I had long hair and someone asked me for something. I did not have my normal stubble at the time

The morning started rough. I could only think of ways to punish myself. And that made me angry. And then I fell asleep again because I stayed in bed. But now I am thinking of the support on the forum and how I should aim for little things. So I am going to get up. Make myself a nice tea and maybe play some star trek online.

Maybe even do some house work by using the Pomodoro technique. Lets see how that goes.

So I believe I got more then enough sleep and way more then you did. Is the tooth pain better or still there? Do you have any plans for today?

[Jarre]

thanks Mira, pains there but numbed with my heavy hitter pills, got to head to supermarket for a quick shop then its chill time after putting another load of washing in. As we say the first tasks that are important is get up, get dressed (though being a sunday dressing gown and novelty slippers is fine) have some breakfast and copious amounts of tea (well that might be just me as on 3rd pint of tea) What is your brain trying to tell you with bad thoughts in the morning, can you slip some positives in to try and lower it a bit?

[Suzi]

I'm so proud of you Mira for fighting the urges! You are awesome.

[Mira]

I love tea, I drank a pint of water so far and to giant mugs of tea.

What will you do to chill?

I am downstairs and I am thinking of opening the curtains. Seems such a trivial thing but for me its letting some goodness in.

My brain always starts with a reboot during the night. But then it gets dark real soon after waking up. All the things I need to do. Where I need to be good at. What I am failing. It sucks the fun out of everything.

I did a bit of positive thinking. Thats what got me out of bed. And dressed. I did start up the PS4 but Star trek online was to triggering. So I am trying some other games but its the same effect. Its like nothing is ok. I should enjoy the route in the games but I only worry.

Going to clear out the dishwasher and try and clean the counter top in the kitchen. Last friday a coworker came in to pick something up (wooden shoes). And eventhough he was only in the front hallway he could see the mess. I still feel ashamed about it. I know people say not to worry about it. But thats a step or 3 to far for me at the moment.

[Jarre]

Relax for me is doing a bit of cities skyline while a concert is playing on my stereo through my headphones so I can have it loud without disturbing neighbours. Its a sandbox game and I just build for asthetics so not stressing about budgets!

[Mira]

Thats great. I am glad you enjoy that. So thats what you will be doing later on.

[Mira]

Gaming is a bit to stressful for me now. I have a headache so i am going to lay on the couch with some netflix.

[Suzi]

Do you find music something that helps? For me music has always been something that helps me concentrate, allows me to get emotions out of my head and genuinely an absolute passion of mine. If I need to tackle something like the kitchen I'll put music going and try to do something for 1 song. Then another... Might help?
Have you been eating and drinking properly? Could your headache be a sign you need some more to drink?

[Mira]

Yes music is a huge part of who I am. It helps me in so many ways.

I did not leave the couch though. Everything around me is a reminder I am not good enough. And how i am not at all smart enough.

I did manage to eat. I am trying a different approach to it
But I dont know if it works. Or what might work at all.

I do drink more then enough. 4 pints of water and 4 big mugs of tea. I love tea so much i could be British