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Thread: families not coping with mental illness

  1. #1

    Question families not coping with mental illness

    not sure if this is the right place for the thread, but it's something that's been on my mind for a while.

    since forever i have tried to explain my mental health to my family. funny thing is i have multiple people in my family who work in mental health, but still don't seem to believe me when i speak to them.

    even after a diagnosis, even after treatment etc. (of which i had to get for myself which was hard as a kid and harder as a teen trying to convince people it's not just teenage angst) it's like there's a wall there and i can't seem to get them to listen.

    i tried sending them videos and articles etc. about mental health, but it's not that they don't have the knowledge. they just don't believe me specifically.

    i don't get why. i was never a compulsive liar even as a kid especially because they never listened.

    yet sometimes my family will throw it back in my face when they're angry, for example, "you're a burden" "why are you laughing when you have nothing to laugh about in your state" "you'll never be able to do XYZ" "the reason i don't want you to do XYZ is because of your anxiety"

    i always thought it was just my mental health but i'm finding out it also applies to physical health too. they just don't listen.

    how do i break down the wall and have a proper conversation instead of a one-sided one?

    perhaps if i were more independant and could do my own thing it wouldn't be a big deal, but i have a total of 0 friends, 0 partners and only family to rely on so yeah i need them a lot right now. most days i can't even leave the house let alone leave home.

    it always drags me back to square one when i'm starting to move forward with my depression. i feel like i'll never escape.

    i want a good relationship with my family but the only way to have that is if it's one-sided with me always apologising for what i haven't done, saying yes to everything and keeping quiet whenever everyone else makes a mistake but accepting it when mine are aired out for the whole family to see.

    i do love my family, and i know everyone makes mistakes and no one's perfect, it's just hard right now for all of us i guess. but it isn't like i got ill overnight.

    i don't know what to do.

    i think it's worse when there's something they want me to do that i either can't do or think will be harmful. for example:

    family: go for a run.

    me: i hurt my ankle.

    family: it'll be good for you.

    me: but i was told to rest.

    family: you're letting your anxiety get in the way.

    me: no, i just don't want it to get worse.

    family: you don't want to get better.

    so i end up pushing myself to do things and often making my family feel better but myself feel worse, and there's no support for me when i feel worse after, it's just oh get over it you're being dramatic.


    sorry this post is so long.

    can anyone relate?

  2. #2
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Surrey. UK
    Ouch! How dare they say things like that to you?! Sweetheart you can get through this, you deserve to be happy...

    You never need to apologise for a long or a short post here. I hope you'll get to know us as friends. I've made some amazing lifelong friends through here.
    Hunni, not everyone is like that. I assume you've tried things like the time-to-change website? Info from Mind?
    Please always remember that I am always right. I have a framed certificate to prove it.

    When in doubt, stop and think... WWSS? (What Would Suzi Say?)
    For more info please see
    THIS thread

  3. #3
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Jane Austen country
    Lovely, Iím so sorry. Actually, Iím appalled. No one should be made to feel like that by anyone else, particularly their family. I promise you will never hear anything like that from members here ...
    ĎWhen all else fails, use glitter insteadí

    Makaluluís Treasures can be found at

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