Page 96 of 196 FirstFirst ... 46869495969798106146 ... LastLast
Results 951 to 960 of 1954

Thread: Me, part 673 *TRIGGERS*

  1. #951
    I've got to agree with suzi there Jaq. Sometimes it's necessary for mums to hear these things, as hard as it may be. Don't feel guilty, it needed to be said, and it's good that she knows.

  2. #952
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    East Riding of Yorkshire
    Posts
    21,555
    Driving lesson was horrendous and I spent a large part of it either holding back tears or with tears streaming down my face. I keep getting told that I need to enjoy my lessons but I'm really not, I dread them and I'm already thinking of when I need to cancel next weeks by so it doesn't cost me. .
    Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro

  3. #953
    Walker extraordinaire!
    Join Date
    Aug 2018
    Location
    Northern Ireland
    Posts
    4,915
    ok. I'm going to tell you something that I say to my daughter

    I never want you to have to stick at something that is really making you miserable and causing you so much stress that you are feeling ill.

    However, I want you to know that you CAN do it.

    I don't want your life to be limited by your fears and anxieties because your fears and anxiety about it are 100times worse than the reality.
    You were so excited at the thought of learning and the independence it would bring you.
    I know driving is stressful and I would hate to be learning again but unless you can relax a little so that your head can process what you are learning it is going to be difficult to get to the stage of enjoying it.
    I'm sure you have tried different ways of relaxing or meditating before your lessons and I probably have no new suggestions but try to keep the end goal in sight.

    Believe in yourself. Easier said than done but you need to to give you the confidence to enjoy and seek that independence.
    Tell yourself...… its only pedals and a wheel. I can do this.

  4. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Strugglingmum For This Useful Post:

    Allalone (21-01-19),Suzi (21-01-19)

  5. #954
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Surrey. UK
    Posts
    95,317
    Can I be blunt? Your teacher isn't right for you.

    At no point should you ever be dreading the lesson. Cancel and find another one. I am so sad that doing something that I love is bringing you so much pain, fear and upset. It should never, ever be like that...
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  6. #955
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    East Riding of Yorkshire
    Posts
    21,555
    I'm struggling with stopping and starting. I've talked it through with J and he's pointed out that my instructor is actually quite negative. I've been getting told for weeks that if I do A then I will fail my test and if I do B then I will fail my test and if I do C I will fail my test... you get the idea! I've only had 6 lessons!!! I try so hard to not do what she's told me will be a fail then I forget about other things. There is a main road, it's actually the main A road into the east of the city, that she wanted me to try today and after a few cock ups with stalling when setting off, I told her that I really didn't feel comfortable with doing that road. When I pulled up at home at the end of my lesson I got told that next lesson I have no choice, I'm doing that road whether I like it or not. I was in tears half way through my lesson, I was in tears at the end of my lesson. She knows a lot of my anxiety with stopping and starting is because I've had years of being sat in the back of my mums car listening to my dad getting aggressive and abusive towards other drivers who are slow or stalled, I'm convinced everyone is like that and knowing there are people behind me panics me more as I'm imagining them doing that, and she knows all this as I've explained it all to her. I spent almost an hour on the phone with J, mostly in tears, and I can feel myself getting upset about it now.
    Last edited by Jaquaia; 21-01-19 at 08:20 PM.
    Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro

  7. #956
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Surrey. UK
    Posts
    95,317
    I wish I could hug you!!!!!!!

    Please, please, please think about changing instructors she sounds like a bi*ch. You deserve better. I highly recommend BSM - I learnt with them and the instructor Ben has now is absolutely lovely. Do you want me to try to see if she knows anyone up near you? Or you could call them and tell them that you're nervous and they will give you someone who is kind, patient and lovely.
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  8. #957

  9. #958
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    Hampshire
    Posts
    52,877
    ((Hugs)) hunni, you ok?
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

  10. #959
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Surrey. UK
    Posts
    95,317
    Jaq, I'm worried about you....
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  11. #960
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    East Riding of Yorkshire
    Posts
    21,555
    Sorry. No need to be worried. I left the house before 8 this morning to go and meet J. We're spending the day at thr Railway Museum then just snuggling up with pizza and Luther tonight. I'll be ok, I always am with him
    Tên përdu, jhamâi së rëcôbro

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •