Having a really tough time suicidal thoughts *TRIG

[Hootytooty]

Hi, I'm having the worst time of my life atm, the last 4 months have been hell, I suffer with anxiety and depression, my GP changed my antidepressants 4 months ago, they didn't agree with me, I'm now under the home treatment team and their doctor, he changed me to another antidepressant that's been working fine with diazepam, I even managed to ween myself off the diazepam, but this week I could feel this funny build up in my chest and haven't stopped crying for 3 days solid, it's got to the point I just want to die,I've been on the phone treatment team this morning after they visited me yesterday, told them how I was feeling, their advice was go back to bed, I also phoned Samaritans because I'm at my wit's end, I also do a lot of guided meditation, I feel so down, I've got no energy to do nothing, I'm losing weight , I have myself, I feel like a burden on everyone, I feel so guilty please can someone help me, I just want to be able to talk to someone that's gone through this and come out the other side, all I keep thinking off is wanting to join my dad and brother in heaven, please someone help me xxx