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Thread: Hello

  1. #1
    Julie
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    Hello

    Hello

    I am new.

    I have dissociative identity disorder and there is a part of me that is depressed. Other parts are not. That is hard to handle too because i feel like no-one including myself understands what it feels like to feel useless, alone, sad and a waste of space.

    Not sure whether you can completely relate to this but I hope people can relate to feeling sad and miserable and like you cannot function

    Julie

  2. #2
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Hi Julie and welcome to DWD.
    Everyone here is really friendly and supportive....

    Are you speaking to your Dr? Do you have a good support network?
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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  4. #3
    Julie
    Guest
    Thank-you Suzi for your reply and thoughtfulness.

    I don't really speak to my doctor. Only when I need diazepam ( for emergency situations)

    I am my support network really. Think I find it difficult with people helping/knowing my feelings etc. Feels vulnerable and I have been badly hurt in therapy.

    Plus a have a husband who tries his best but can make things worse at times

    I have friends but they do not know my all /extent of my problems and I like it that why. They support by being who they are.

    I live in a beautiful place which helps

    I like listening to music which is great support and I play the drums

  5. #4
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Hampshire
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    Hi Julie and welcome. Other than the diazepam, what medications/treatment are you taking?
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

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  7. #5
    Julie
    Guest
    Hello Paula,

    Thank-you for your welcome

    propanolol p.r.n

  8. #6
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Have you ever taken anything long term such as an antidepressant?
    Would you try a different form of therapy?
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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  10. #7
    Julie
    Guest

    M

    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi View Post
    Have you ever taken anything long term such as an antidepressant?
    Would you try a different form of therapy?
    I don't wish to take antidepressants. I appreciate they may be appropriate for many and helpful to many but my experience hasn't been. My experience has been negative.

    I do not wish to go to therapy currently . I will maybe in the future but it is not the right things for me now

    I am preferring self help, self love, acceptance, strengthening my connection to partner and friends and others, walking in the countryside, listening to music, yoga, journalling, writing and playing the drums.


    Thank-you for your kindness in thinking of me,

    sending kindness and love your way .

    Hope your day is feeling right for you


  11. #8
    Julie
    Guest
    I am also wanting to look at my feelings of feeling sad, alone, useless.. I am wanting to feel them not disown them, dissociate away from them, avoid them. I am wanting to sit with them however hard.I am wanting to show myself compassion and love for the person I was who was hurt and abandoned as a child and be there for that part of me.

    Ideally I would like other people to accept I have feelings and sit with me but it is a big ask for many. Many have their own issues or disowned pain which is huge and i know because i find dealing with other peoples feelings hard. I find it hard because triggers my feelings which have not been processed so I would rather not feel what they are feeling. It is so hard to feel, to feel what my body is feeling, to feel what my mind is feeling, to accept and to just be. I am lucky I have a husband who is trying to do that.

    I know I am safe now. I know there is no threat. I know I have choices now. It is hard to let feelings come and go.

    I will keep on trying

  12. #9
    Julie
    Guest
    Thank-you everyone for your responses and wanting to help
    Julie

  13. #10
    A Crab
    Guest
    Welcome, I'm new too, I know how you feel about the antidepressants, I was on a couple different types for a while but I never noticed any effect apart from side effects so I ended up stopping. Though, I do still respect that it depends on the person and type of anti. Might head down the doctors at some point and have a chat with him about different ones or a different route for sure

    All the best

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