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Thread: Not coping so well...

  1. #11
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    We've a few members who use audio books to help them..
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  2. #12
    Queen of Crafting magie06's Avatar
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    It took me a while to regain my love of reading. I couldn't concentrate and I just couldn't get into any book. I started small, reading short stories, and then moved onto teenage books that really didn't take much to read them. I'm still only reading chic lit, but I'm enjoying them all and there is loads of them about.

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  4. #13
    Justchris
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    That is a good idea. I might try it too, I’m thinking Morgan freeman as narrator

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  6. #14
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    I'm a firm believer in it doesn't matter what you're reading if you enjoy it!
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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  8. #15
    CaterpillarGirl
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    Not coping so well...

    Hey guys, I know I disappeared for a few days, I've not been having a very good week and have been trying to talk myself into coming on here but I just couldn't bring myself to because I don't want to be a burden or annoy everybody (stupid right? Given that this is a forum for this exact thing, unfortunately I can't switch off that voice in the back of my mind that says "nobody cares")

    The truth is, I've just had enough, of all of it. I'm sick of the smallest things being an accomplishment, taking the dog for a walk, washing the pots, the sort of thing everybody else does every day without even thinking about it. It's not fair, I want to be able to do those things without it being such a big deal, it shouldn't be so hard to tidy the house, or take a shower, but even though I really want to do those things I can't, because this massive weight comes down on me and I feel like I can't move and I just want to scream or cry or both.

    I'm sick of feeling sick all the time, of the constant stomach pain and always feeling like I'm on the verge of tears, trying to avoid leaving the house because I'm worried people will talk to me or look at me and when I do leave the house (and only because I have to for work etc) I can't breathe, my chest gets so tight and my legs feel so weak and I just have to push through it even though all I want to do is break down and cry.

    I'm sick of feeling like a terrible mother, a terrible friend, a terrible daughter, like I'm not good enough for anybody and they'd all be bette off without me. I've had enough of constantly arguing with my daughter or snapping at her, of being irritated by the smallest things and losing my temper over nothing. I need to deal with this but I can't, I'm still waiting for my counselling appointment and I still can't bring myself to make a doctor's appointment even though I know I need to.

    I just want it all to end, I just want to feel normal again and I don't know what to do...

  9. #16
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Oh hunni . You’re not annoying anyone and you’re not a burden. I care, I really do and I do understand how you’re feeling - completely. Lovely, the ‘small’ things are usually the most important things to get right (making sure the dog gets walked is very important, for instance, as is self care eg taking a shower) and these are normally the first casualties in the battle against this illness. In my experience, it’s often easier to put the mask on in front of the world than it is to convince myself to get off the sofa to make breakfast.

    I very much doubt you’re a terrible friend, daughter, mother, this illness is really accomplished at whispering in our ear that we fail at relationships. Does it help to know it carries out that whispering campaign on almost everyone with depression? But it’s just not true.

    Sweetie, please, please, please call the doctors for an appointment today and print out this post to shows the doctor ....
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

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  11. #17
    CaterpillarGirl
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    In a way its nice to know I'm not the only one going through it, at the same time though I wouldn't wish this on anyone! It's funny isn't it how we can go out and act like we're completely fine and nobody has any idea, the few people I have told always say things like "but you don't seem like you have depression" or "you always look like you're happy" and yet behind closed doors it's a completely different story! I really do want to make an appointment with my doctor because I know I need help and I'm not entirely sure how much longer I can cope with it all, but because I suffer from anxiety as well I just can't seem to bring myself to do it, and even if I did manage to make the appointment there's no guarantee I would go to it.

  12. #18
    Queen of Crafting magie06's Avatar
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    You need to see someone though. It's probably difficult at this stage to see your regular gp, (although they should have an emergency appointment system). If you can't see your regular doctor, please see someone.

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  14. #19
    CaterpillarGirl
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    I know I do, I'm going away with family for a long weekend today after work though so it will have to wait until I get back

  15. #20
    Queen of Crafting magie06's Avatar
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    Enjoy your weekend. I was going to ask were you going somewhere nice, but you're hardly going somewhere terrible!! Lol.
    Try ringing someone and have something in place for when you come back.

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