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Thread: Looking for somewhere to turn.

  1. #11
    dcalong
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    Quote Originally Posted by Justchris View Post
    The one that grinds my gears the most... you’re lazy.
    I'm quite good at discouraging that one, I tell people that I'd like to travel the world and see everything. I want to get my own home and have kids and enjoy life. People say 'well, why don't you go and do it then', luckily I've push away anyone close to me so it's only the occasional colleague at work that says it now.

  2. #12
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Actually that sounds really sad that you think it's a good thing that you've pushed everyone away.....
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  3. #13
    dcalong
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    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi View Post
    Actually that sounds really sad that you think it's a good thing that you've pushed everyone away.....
    It brings me down to serious lows when I upset someone close to me. I over think every word I've said and everything I've done to work out why I've pushed them away. It's made me feel very suicidal before. By not having anyone close I can't run the risk of pushing them away and feeling like that. Even people who know me and my depression have drifted away, I guess everyone has their limits. I avoid talking or showing any emotions for fear of upsetting anyone, I'm basically a robot now.

  4. #14
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Maybe you're trying too hard lovely?
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  5. #15
    dcalong
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    Quote Originally Posted by Suzi View Post
    Maybe you're trying too hard lovely?
    That could well be one of the problems. I get on well with someone so want to males things work and keep then happy.

  6. #16
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    But what about making you happy?
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  7. #17
    Justchris
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    I get it bud, if you push away everyone then you can’t possibly mess anything up because there’s nothing to mess up. I had the same thinking for a long time and if I let myself go down that path it still occurs. Trouble with that, is that it’s not worth it. The loneliness and isolation you create for yourself outweighs the possible cons of having friendships and relationships with people. I’m now currently fighting to get the lost people back in my life. It goes against the grain for me even now but I know it’s for the best.
    You can’t do life on your own and there are some things you have to push through rather than avoid, even if it hurts to start with

  8. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Justchris For This Useful Post:

    magie06 (24-07-18),Paula (24-07-18)

  9. #18
    dcalong
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    During one of my CBT sessions they asked what I wanted to do for myself and I said nothing. There's nothing I want and no where I want to go, I'm living for other people. If I'm not doing something for someone else then I'm sitting at home and if I do that for too long I start getting depressed. It's why I do a lot of voluntary work and extra hours at work, to keep myself busy and pass the time. I don't want to be in this cycle but as soon as I get close to someone (or even make a new friend), I end up doing something to ruin it.

  10. #19
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Was there anything you were interested in growing up that you could take up again?
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

  11. #20
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Have you ever used things like meetup or Spice?
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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