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  1. #1

    My girlfriend is making my depression worse

    Iím really struggling to the point of breaking up with my girlfriend over my depression.

    Naturally Iím a loner and I need downtime even after fairly standard social interactions. Work drains me badly during the week and spending time with people during the evenings and weekends can literally badly upset my balance for weeks afterwards.

    Now I enjoy spending time with my girlfriend but she doesnít either understand or care that socially actually makes me suffer. I am quite happy to spend the day with her but then she tries to organise things for the next day and get irrated because I donít want to see her but I need that downtime to recover. She constantly pushes and pushes at me with no respite, I have got to the stage I cannot open her text messages anyway because my anxiety goes into overdrive.

    I donít know what to do anymore, mild hints go unnoticed, being clear in what I need just makes her become pushy to the point I get into a bad mood and lock up, the only thing that seems to work is ignoring her or being nasty but I donít want to upset her.

  2. #2
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome to DWD. Have you told her how you are feeling? Have you spoken to your Dr?
    Today I aim to be the best person I can be.
    That mean that yesterday or tomorrow I might be a better person,
    but today's best is more than good enough for today.

  3. #3
    I have told her countless times, infact even last night we had a discussion about it, then today it was like we never even had the discussion.

    I’ve gave up on doctors, meds and counselling. I know my triggers and I know how to deal with them, people just don’t understand I need downtime to deal with it.

  4. #4
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Can I ask why you gave up on doctors, meds and counselling?
    How long have you been together?
    Today I aim to be the best person I can be.
    That mean that yesterday or tomorrow I might be a better person,
    but today's best is more than good enough for today.

  5. #5
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome. Itís common for our loved ones to think that, if they push, we can Ďget past ití. To a certain extent it is important to push ourselves when we can but obviously your girlfriend hasnít understood your limits. Take a look at the Time to Change website, it can help with talking about the illness with those who care about us
    Sometimes the best thing you can do is not think, not wonder, not imagine, not obsess. Just breathe and have faith that everything will work out for the best.

  6. #6
    Welcome to DWD I can vouch for what Paula has suggested. Time to Change website have some very useful info and common sense approaches. Good luck.

  7. #7
    Moderator OldMike's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome to DWD
    71 and counting, less of the "Old" call me "Mike"
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