Hi everyone...my name is Jill. I'm 48 and from Minnesota, and I have a lot going on right now.

Of course, I have depression...that's why I'm here. I also suffer from anxiety, chronic fatigue, chronic pain, and diabetes. I don't take care of myself the way I should, but as we all know, depression is very good at helping that along.

I have a 90-year-old father in assisted living who's declining cognitively. He lives close by and my sister and I take care of him as well as my daughter works there as an aide.

I quit my job over a year ago due to debilitating anxiety and lived off of my dad's money - I reside in our family home - but finally realized I needed to step up and become employed, so I started a new job working from home as a transcriptionist two weeks ago. The job itself is great, but I'm already finding trouble concentrating and staying on task at the end of my second week and have had to "call in sick" to deal with my anxiety and focus.

I met a man online over 20 years ago and we kept in touch all this time. Finally, back in October, I flew down to Texas to meet him in person for the first time. It was great, and I've been back there 3 times since. However, we've been arguing since I got back about some things he had concerns about during my visit, and we haven't spoken in over a week.

I have a very small social circle. It's just my dad, sister, and daughter (age 26) in my family, and most of my friends are on Facebook. Recently, one of my best friends there has gone AWOL and isn't on Messenger or FB, and I'm worried about her as well. She was my sounding board on a lot of my stress, and I miss her.

I started smoking as a goof when I was in Texas just to get that little high...but since January, I've started up full speed. I use it for stress relief, but I hate it really and I know how bad it is for me. No one really knows about it, and I do a good job of hiding it.

As you can see, a lot of things I listed are not under my control, but I continue to ruminate over them daily and nightly. That's my story. I hope to find some advice and support from this group. Feel free to ask me anything -- I'm an open book.

Thanks for listening.

Jill