Well I am pleased it's part of the illness in a sense then.... You definitely make sense saying it like that.. I had worried he just couldn't be bothered so it's a relief to know he's not doing it on purpose...
I am slightly worried though as his friend messaged me (the friend he sent a picture of him cutting himself to) and just called him a div and a d*** and said he will speak to him.. It's his best friend so I am not sure if that would help...
Wow. I’d be prettyed if my friend had that sort of conversation with my partner .....
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
Ouch! With friends like that who needs enemies...
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
He's come home today in a really really fowl mood.. Like worse than usual :'( ... I've asked if I've upset him and what's wrong and he just says nothing....
I actually asked his friend not to say anything but I think he has anyway.. I even asked him to call me before he spoke to him so I could explain to him to be a little bit more sensitive but he didn't.. I told him he's not well and he's just said he's being an attention seeker... ...
Maybe you haven't upset him at all and he's just having a crappy day - I've had a few this week too....
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
Perhaps you're right.. He did become a bit more talkative before he went gym and mentioned how he's feeling crappy and angry like everyday this week and how he's fed up of it...
It's good that he's able to go to the gym. That's a big positive - gives him something to focus on and exercise is great for releasing endorphins...
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
Yes we've both been a lot more active.. He tries to go often.. And I go a minimum of 3 times a week.. Which is a great way for me to to relieve some frustrations if you know what I mean haha...
I just hope it's helping it...
Last night he opened up a bit again.. He opens up at the strangest of times..
We were laying in bed and he said how he was dreading this sleep.. I asked why and he said because he knows he's not going to be able to sleep because he's stressed.. Again I asked why.. He said he was stressed because he has his supervisor assessment tomorrow and is worried about it and was already stressed before.. Again I asked why.. He said that he was stressed out about paintball because he doesn't want to go this weekend or to the tournament next weekend (their first tournament of the year) .. I said "Of course you do but your worrying yourself about it already.. You had a good time last time so perhaps just remember that" then he went on to tell me how he didn't have a good time and only spoke to a small number of people because he didn't feel comfortable.. So I told him to try not to worry about things too far in advance and to take day by day because he doesn't know how he will feel at that point... He said how he was fed up because he feels like he's dying inside and just wants to feel normal again.. I moved closer to him and hugged him because at this point I genuinely don't know what to say.. He spoke of how he feels fed up and feels like he's losing himself and doesn't feel like his normal self anymore.. I asked if there's anything I could do and he said he said "what can you do".. I said I'll try anything which might help like a cuddle (to which he said they don't help) and then leaving him alone every so often (to which he shrugged his shoulders) ..
I told him that I loved him and he said he knows.. I asked him why he didn't want to tell me and he said he does and said I love you too.. Perhaps stupidly.. I said "it's okay if you don't love me anymore" (a friend had unhelpfully told me perhaps he's being like this because he's not IN love with me anymore and naturally it had been playing on my mind so I wanted him to know it was okay if that was the case) .. He just replied with "I do" .. I kissed his shoulder and rolled over to go to sleep.. We both dozed off and he woke up shortly after having had a nightmare.. I offered to stroke his hair as it relaxes him and he asked me too so I did as we went off to sleep...
I am glad he felt he could tell me how he felt and that he was stressed.. I genuinely feel lost on what to say back that might be of some help...
Sometimes there isn't anything to say and you just have to listen...
Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!
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