Hi all

Not really been here as apart from a wobble I've been coping ok . But now I'm back on the bench signed off for 3 weeks with low mood and work related stress and back on citalopram.

I was ok for 3 years now I'm not . How'd I get here? Work has been full on in my new senior role with a team of 9 for 9 months . Four hour commute working at home and weekends and not able to switch off or sleep with anxiety through the workload I have and no space to ask for help as we've no budget for staff. So no sleep, anxiety and crying and isolating myself. Went to the doctor not my Normal GP who wasn't great. I'm struggling . Was at doctors two weeks ago for something else and was I thought coping , two weeks later I'm not and need help. He made me feel a fraud and a time waster. I'll mention this at review with my GP who is excellent .

The guilt is unbearable, I feel a failure and worthless again. I need to get out of the circumstance and environment that make me feel that way. Still yet to talk to boss that'll happen Monday . If you've got this far thanks for reading . Now going to rest and cry with my dog .

I feel such a burden on everyone .