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Thread: Nothing changes **Trigger warning**

  1. #1
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    Nothing changes **Trigger warning**

    Hi all.
    Haven't been posting for a while.
    I feel nothing is changing and I will always be afraid of life. Eveything feels incredible hard (from going shopping to cooking to looking after myself). I am seeing my therapist once a week and I talk about how I feel stuck. I know I need to be patient. But everyday I ask myself what's the point? (To assure you I am not suicidal). I just wish I was never born. I don't know how to stop the overthinking and worrying all the time - am I capable to do my job, what do people think of me, how do I come across, do people like me. I often feel like the third wheel. I know, it's mostly in my head. Knowing it's ridiculous and those are no real problems make it really hard talking about how feel.

  2. #2
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Hi Samantha, it’s good to see you but I’m sorry you’re struggling. When did you last see your doctor?
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

  3. #3
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    I don't see the GP about this, just my therapist. I know people will say, go and see your doctor. I don't want to. I am scared they will put me on meds and the meds won't work. And than it's real. I am just weak, lazy, incapable, needy, attention seeking...

  4. #4
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    You aren't lazy or weak or any of those other negatives. Why are you scared at trying meds?
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  5. #5
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    That they don't help. Part of me believes I am over exaggerating instead of just getting on with everyday life.
    Taking meds means I am a loser. I know there are so many on meds, and none of you is a loser. You all have valid reasons, I don't have those, I just need to get over myself.

  6. #6
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    Samantha I'm sorry love but that's b(llocks. Depression is a REAL thing. It isn't made up and it certainly isn't something that you can "just get over." Would you say the same for a diabetic who needed insulin or me who needs to take a cocktail of drugs every day to be able to keep moving?
    Yes it's true that you might have to try a couple of different ones to find the one which suits you better, but I really don't think it's something you should dismiss - especially if you are as low as you sound atm...
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


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  8. #7
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    I am not saying it's not real. Just not sure it's really applying to me. Maybe I make it sound worse than it is. What's normal? What's the limit?

  9. #8
    Boss Lady ;) Suzi's Avatar
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    If you are wishing that you weren't here then that's pretty serious if you ask me.
    Do a little of something that makes you happy every day!


  10. #9
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Samantha, you’ve been here on and off for over 3 years and, in that whole time, I have never seen you happy or content with life. If that’s not real depression, I don’t know what is
    The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

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  12. #10
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    I am feeling incredible lonely and scared. It's difficult to explain what I feel, that I don't enjoy life.

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