We eat together in the evenings, but I don't think I should talk about my depression and coping methods in front of our children. And I didn't want her to worry. But she knows now.

I've found someone at work, above me but below my manager, who agrees that some of the tasks I'm being given to do as "high priority" are relatively menial compared to the tasks which impact functionality.
I'll tell my manager in the morning. I've been emailing him the last 2 days, but gotten no replies, not even to the request for time off for my appointment next week.