Running off a cliff *potential SU trigger*

[Pen]

Been getting stressed again. There is just so much to do and so little time. Been writing to the Samaritans most nights. Last night I was starting to feel suicidal again. It's a battle to fight my brain when it starts to tell me I'm useless and pathetic.
What i really need to do today is spend most of it away from pottery (i have a class at 4 this afternoon) and chill out, however I have 25 cows to glaze and get into the kiln today.
I am also getting frustrated with the kids again. Since A stated his new job he had abandoned doing his share of the housework and I have done the majority of the washing up and bathroom cleaning this week. At the same time H has lost interest in making and selling her own pottery again. I find it frustrating that she starts a new project but gives up before she gives it a proper chance to come to fruition. We now have a handful of mugs kicking around gathering dust that she made to sell but have not been put into any site for sale.

[Paula]

Being the mother of adult children who are still living at home is an impossible situation. They are adults and have their own lives now but you can see every single misstep they make - and you can’t do anything about it. My tongue is red raw from biting it ..... However, is it possible she’s scared to try to sell them in case no ones interested which will ‘prove’ she’s useless?

As for A, you’re probably going to have to lay down the rules again. They’re so lucky you’ve let them live with you and it wouldn’t hurt to remind hem of that occasionally

[Suzi]

I completely agree with Paula... Have you considered going back to the Drs as this patch seems to be prolonging a bit?

[Pen]

Thankfully I did not have to lay down the law. I came in from this afternoons class to find the two of them cleaning the house .
I think what is really affecting me is my diet. I rely on H to prepare my meals during the week but this week we have eaten junk food and takeaways all week.
I am so tired tonight I accidentally fed Mr tiggs dog food. I did realise in time and was able to change it back.

[Suzi]

Oops!
I'm sure he wouldn't have minded!

Glad that they've been cleaning the house! What's A's new job?

[Pen]

Mr tiggs is such a big cat I am sure he would have just tucked in, it was a sample of a really good fish based one so he would not have come to any harm.
A has got a job working nights at the Argos distribution centre. He has been there about 3 weeks now and seems to be getting on ok they have just moved him from packing cages to loading lorries so they seem to be pleased with him. Of course out means he sleeps most of the day and leaves for work at 9 at night so he sort of forgets about normal stuff like cleaning the toilet. I think H may have had words with him. He is starting to find the nights tough on his days off. His clock is off so he can't get to sleep till 4 in the morning and kicking around the house all night whilst we sleep is quite lonely.

[Suzi]

Night shifts aren't my idea of fun either...
How's your mood now? Any brighter?

[OldMike]

I've worked nights during the week and when it comes weekend you don't know when to go to bed everything seems messed up.

[Pen]

Night shifts aren't my idea of fun either...
How's your mood now? Any brighter?

I don't know really. I am still quite low but then I am very tired. Tomorrow I have a bit of shopping to do. I have no food in and I need to get my meds, after that I am going to meet a lady who is selling off her pottery stuff to see if she has anything I may want. So another busy day.

[Paula]

Try to at least pace today, lovely