Not sure were to start on this problem so the beginning is a good place. Theoretically I should be moving on and I want to so much, these dreams are haunting me. I met my ex husband many years ago and fell deeply in love with him. Through out the years we had many problems and split up for a few years before getting back together. We married, had kids, a business, it was never enough as he had drink. With the drinking came abuse. I got depression combined with a lot of debt through his actions.

Fast forward to present day . Most of the debt has been paid back, I am single again, my kids now teens have turned out to be well rounded sensible teenagers who are doing well in life. So you may be asking yourself what the problem is. It is me . As well as going through anxiety, depression and perimenopause I ask haunted by dreams of the ex. I want to move on so badly. Why am I denied a second chance at life ? I still love the person my ex once was. It doesn't matter how many times I remind myself of all the nasty abusive things he did to me there is a part that needs closure. My dreams consist of the same content which is normally about his abandonment of me. It hurts like hell. No amount of drugs are going to cure these dreams so what do I do ? He moved on for me its a living hell. Deep down my soul is very lonely and I am sick to death of acting out my life as though it is perfectly normal.