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Thread: My story *SU TRIGGERS*

  1. #1
    Andrew
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    My story *SU TRIGGERS*

    Hi everyone,

    I'm new to this and just need someone to talk too.

    So 3 years ago I got depression and I've had it ever since. I didn't take it seriously, I'd stop taking medication etc. I treat my partner badly in that time. I couldn't deal with life and I shut her out completely. It's lost me jobs, friends and recently me and my partner split up. I still love her so much and have true regret for not sorting my mental health out.

    Tuesday I went to the gp and she's put me on sertraline. Side effects have been really bad. I've slept 5 hours in the last 2 days and I'm a message.

    Yesterday, my ex left her phone by accident at my house when picking our daughter up. I looked at her texts and found out she's been sleeping with my best mate. This has completely turned my life upside down. I can't cope with it.
    Last edited by Jaquaia; 21-10-17 at 12:33 PM. Reason: Trigger warning added as per DWD procedure

  2. #2
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Hi and welcome. Side effects can be tough at the beginning but they should pass within a couple of weeks. Be kind to yourself, you need it right now. Are you able to work at the moment?

    Can I ask how long its been since you and your partner split up?
    Sometimes the best thing you can do is not think, not wonder, not imagine, not obsess. Just breathe and have faith that everything will work out for the best.

  3. #3
    Andrew
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paula View Post
    Hi and welcome. Side effects can be tough at the beginning but they should pass within a couple of weeks. Be kind to yourself, you need it right now. Are you able to work at the moment?

    Can I ask how long it’s been since you and your partner split up?
    I rang in sick for work today as I've had barely any sleep. We've been split up for 3 months. Everything is so raw.

  4. #4
    Andrew
    Guest
    I'm so tired of my life. I feel like my mind is a prison. I want to end it but I'm not brave enough.

  5. #5
    Moderator OldMike's Avatar
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    Hi Andrew I'm on Sertraline (have been on and off for 25 years) it takes a while for them to kick in and any side effects usually go after a month or so, just hang on in there and I know this is a cliche take it a day at a time.
    71 and counting, less of the "Old" call me "Mike"
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  6. #6
    Andrew
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    I just want my mind to stop being in overdrive. I've got so much regret in my life. It's like I'm not meant to be happy. I'm sick of not being happy. I'm a totally different person to who I was and who I want to be.

  7. #7
    Librarian and chief holder of antiquities and biscuits Jaquaia's Avatar
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    Hey Andrew, can you go back to your gp and tell them about your suicidal thoughts please. They could just be side effects of starting the sertraline, I know that I suffered really badly with suicidal thoughts and self-harming when I started them the 2nd time round, I was given diazepam to help me get through the first few weeks. It might be worth asking to go on sick for a while and counselling may help?
    Tn prdu, jhami s rcbro

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to Jaquaia For This Useful Post:

    Suzi (21-10-17)

  9. #8
    Andrew
    Guest
    I'm at work tomorrow and Monday x2 12 hour shifts. I'm dreading it. I went to primary care centre late Wednesday night cos of heart palpitations but the doctor just said I've got extreme anxiety now. I can't afford to stay off work. I'm moving into my own house on Halloween after being back at my dad's for split with ex.

    She has a lot of anger at me and I've got a lot to myself. I've treated her shockingly. I'm so regretful. I hate my life. I've had such a craps life. Homeless from 16-19 and then she came along and worshipped the ground I walked on and I did to her too. Why did this depression come to me when my life was the happiest and had everything I ever wanted? Why am I not meant to ever be happy. It's hard taking it day to day. My mind won't stop. Every day feels like a week. I'm just tired of being here.

  10. #9
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Hi Andrew and welcome to DWD.
    Sweetheart please go back and see the dr and tell them about these suicidal thoughts. It's really important. If you think that you might act on them or hurt yourself then please go to A+E and ask to see the on call mental health nurse. You can get through this, sounds like you need a bit of extra help right now. Her sleeping with your best friend isn't great for you, and finding out in the way that you did can't have helped - but you can move forwards...
    Today I aim to be the best person I can be.
    That mean that yesterday or tomorrow I might be a better person,
    but today's best is more than good enough for today.

  11. #10
    Andrew
    Guest
    I'll ring gp on Tuesday. I don't want to move forward in my life. I want my old life back without having this thing in my head. I'd worked so hard to get to where I was and its all gone. I was so so happy before I got depression and now it's ruined my life and I don't want to live with it any longer.

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