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Thread: My life is so hard

  1. #1

    My life is so hard

    After a horrible few weeks I am feeling shattered. I have started my new job, quit, been offered my old job back but can't take it because the contract for it has been signed, then had to grovel for my new job back. Honestly I couldn't make it up if I tried. To add to the mayhem a young child ran in to the side of my car. At this moment in time I think I am loosing my mind. Things keep getting misplaced and its driving me insane. My teens don't want to get involved in my dramas, obviously they do care but teens being teens tend to think about their own worlds. I am so alone and feeling desperately alone. At times I feel as though I have lost the will to be happy . What can you do when you feel flat but your moods are not normal ? I keep thinking is this the start of the menopause or depression. I am seriously beginning to think I am nothing more than an unlovable workhorse. My life feels empty and void of affection.

    I have noticed patterns of ocd creeping in , the washer has to go on at a certain time, I leave the house at the exact same time, it goes on and on. Each night I have to play a certain game. Thankfully insomnia has kicked in so I am too tired to start the cleaning regime which lasts for days. Yes, I know I am not right but what the hell do I do with myself ? My head is not in a good place . Sorry for the miserable post you are the only people prepared to lend an ear.

  2. #2
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    Hi lovely. Can you get to see your Dr and tell them all of this?
    “You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
    - Jon Kabat-Zinn

  3. #3
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Oh sweetheart it really has been rough . How is the child? And, yes, I know teens live in their own world but they're old enough to know that you can't carry everything and that they may have to step up a bit .....
    I believe if you wear enough pretty lipstick, sparkly jewellery and great shoes, no one will notice the size of your ass

  4. #4
    I can Suzi but to be honest I feel foolish. I am not mad in any way shape or form just so empty, its like being wrung out. There is only sadness left. All of my life has been filled with stress, worry and responsibility you would think I would find life easier to deal with now I am older.Asking for help makes me feel so weak, not to mention embarrassed that I need to vent my inner most demons to a doctor who can only give me five mins. That's why I am so reluctant to go. In the past I have always felt fobbed off by doctors so to pluck up the courage to go and feel let down leaves me feeling emotionally ship wrecked. I think I need some kind of mental health support worker . Are these types of support workers only for people more severely affected than I am ?

  5. #5
    Princess Sparkles Paula's Avatar
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    Of course you're not mad. But that doesn't mean you don't need help. Sadness, emptiness, stress, worry, inner demons, emotionally ship wrecked. If you put all those together we're looking at serious issues that you have to talk to a doctor about. And feeling like this does not make you weak - most of the strongest people I know suffer from depression (and yeah I'm finally able to admit that I'm one of them).

    If you struggle getting your point across then it may help to write down everything that's going on (or print out your posts here) to show your doctor. Apart from anything else, you can only access specialist services like a support worker by seeing your doctor first
    I believe if you wear enough pretty lipstick, sparkly jewellery and great shoes, no one will notice the size of your ass

  6. #6
    Not "nagging" really... Suzi's Avatar
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    I completely agree with Paula. Your GP is your first step to getting access to the help and support you sound like you need.
    “You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
    - Jon Kabat-Zinn

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